stroking on the stroke

When a guy masturbates at the stroke of midnight. A sad event when the man should be doing something more worth his time.

Fred: Hey, shouldn't Kermit be celebrating NYE with us tonight?
Joe Joe: Meh, I bet you he'll be stroking on the stroke.

Jane: Hey what did you and Kermit do for Valentine's?
Alexa: I went out with the girls, I bet the poor guy was stroking on the stroke.

by mong returns January 10, 2012

smoking the tree

Something an old person says when he suspects someone has been smoking weed.

Jim-Jim, you've been smoking the tree again haven't you?

by Orangeblood August 3, 2004

smoking the drapes

a figure of speech for smoking pot

If you really believe that story, you must be smoking the drapes.

by mr. mr. 2121 February 11, 2009

smoking resin

Shit to do when you're broke.

I'd been smoking nug for 3 months, but then lost my damn job. I had to boil my bowl and been smoking resin for the last 4 days. Its a dirty but pleasant high. Least from high grade.

by -Rayo November 19, 2013

Rosetta Stoning

1. The act of heaving an object -- usually a rock or an empty beer can -- at your wife/girlfriend after she's said something that doesn't make any sense.

2. A violent act which occurs between a man and woman after a breakdown in communication.

Woman: "I know game seven of The World Series is on tonight, but I thought we could watch a John Cusack movie instead."

Man: *picks up x-box controller* "You're in for a Rosetta Stoning."

by Bad Obnauticus October 29, 2009

Smokin' and Jokin'

US Army terminology utilized to describe a person or people who are standing around smoking cigarettes and chattering about car chase movies when they should be doing something constructive.

Officer: Where the hell are all of the Soldiers?

NCO: Not sure, Sir, but I think they might be out back.

Officer: Alright, can you get them to load that new equipment onto the trucks by the motor pool?

NCO: Roger, Sir. Smokin' and Jokin' is NOT an MOS, so I will get their attention! (walks away)

NCO to Soldiers: Alright, assholes no more smokin' and jokin'! Get your asses to work, NOW!!!!

by The Preggerses February 13, 2012

smoking broccoli

smoking weed; marijuana

"I be smoking broccoli, they say it's good for my health."- Kodak Black

by skrtskrilla April 8, 2017