Stretch Stat

A professional sports statistic that is contrived and presented in a manner so it sounds more significant than it really is.

"Christian Pulisic has failed to score in 2021"

- " C'mon...that's a stretch Stat -it's only Jan 30th!"

"Hey - did you know Dallas is undefeated this season when Zeke Elliott rushes for 100+ yards? "

- " ummmmm seems like a stretch stat seeing as he has only done that twice the entire 16 game season"

by LeoMarbson January 30, 2021

Swedish stretch

When someone pulls their dick almost to the breaking point on a regular basis in order to increase the length over time

Danny told me he tried to give himself the Swedish stretch over the weekend and ended up in the ER…

by catmommy42069 November 27, 2022

Stretch Lemur

The act of painting a small rodent black and white (like a lemur tail) and inserting ones dong inside it's bum and out it's mouth. Then screwing some hot babe with it on your lap rocket.

Guy 1: "So how did prom go?"
Guy 2: "It was going good until her mom asked me to give her a Stretch Lemur, then It went great!"

by Silent Z 91 May 18, 2011

Sanford Stretch

The act of intercourse where two fingers are placed in partner's booty hole and then spread apart and one must yell in the hole. If you hear an echo consider your attempt a success.

Bro, I gave this B the Sanford Stretch last night and damn shit echoed like i was at the Grand Canyon.

by T-Free88 May 15, 2010

stretching the internet

When you're procrastinating on some task by browsing the internet but you're running out of your normal sites to distract you.

I was unmotivated at work today so I was stretching the internet.

by joesappy October 21, 2021

Aaron Stretches

A stretch one performs prior to masturbation to prevent awful forearm cramps. It is usually done by holding the arm straight out and pulling the fingers back over the arm.

Wow, I pulled a muscle wanking it last night... I should have done some Aaron Stretches first!

by Sir Uncealot April 15, 2008

Hole Stretch

Another term for weed, cannibis, marijuana, ect.

Yo I just copped a O of some hole stretch you wanna come sesh?

by _Nigiri February 22, 2022