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J.D. Vance

The couch humper who Donald Trump selected to be his running mate in the 2024 election.
Did you see the mascara running down the face of that couch humper J.D. Vance?
by Lynch/Fellini August 9, 2024
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Eli Vance

Eli Vance: "There's nothing Gordon can't handle, with the possible exception of you ;)"
Alyx: "Dad.. Please"
Eli, Again: "EHHHHHHHHHHHHHĦHHHHHHHĦHHHHHHHĦHHHHHHHĦHHHHHHHĦHHHHHHHĦ"
by iminhellplshelpahhh August 9, 2024
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JD Vance

That guy is a total JD Vance. I don’t let him near my couch anymore.
by anonymouscornholio August 10, 2024
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J.D. Vance

To masturbate using an inanimate object not made for the purpose of masturbation, such as a couch.
That one guy in “American Pie” J.D. Vanced a pie.
by PNut22 August 10, 2024
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J.D. Vance

A verb, to masturbate using an inanimate object not intended for self-pleasure, such as a couch
In a famous 1999 film, a sexually frustrated high school student J.D. Vances a pie.
by PNut22 August 10, 2024
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Vancing

The action of sticking your penis in between the cushions of a couch
I had to replace my new couch after I caught my roommate Vancing it.
by burningviolins August 10, 2024
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JD Vance

A man who will sacrifice any and all personal values for the sake of remaining relevant and popular.

Example: Calling someone “Americans Hitler” and “Cultural Heroine” only to then end up as their running mate and singing their high praises

Secondary definition: A dolphin and couch fucker
That person has no backbone, they were trying to get me fired and now they are sucking up to me since I’ve gotten a promotion. They’re such a “JD Vance”
by SZCY August 11, 2024
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