Wiping the Turtle's mouth

When you are trying to poo (shit) but the faeces gets lodged in the opening to the anal cavity, often known as a turtle's head poking out. When you can push no more, but the turtle remains trapped, wiping during this scenario is known as Wiping the Turtle's mouth.

Craig came back from the dunger and informed Jon "That was a tough one Jon, I just ended up wiping the turtle's mouth" Jon understood instantly.

by Broaders September 6, 2019

wiping your ass with a hoop

being involved in a situation that doesn't seem to have an end..going in circles and not getting any results

trying to herd cats is like wiping your ass with a hoop

by skinner54 May 24, 2010

Wiping Margott

Wiping Margott is the act of wiping from the front after taking a crap, rather then from behind. It is an awkward and messy approach but preferred by many.

"what's that stain on your sleeve?"
"oh, I was wiping margott and slipped"

by Sammy Gooch October 5, 2011

Wiping a year from my eye

A sarcastic response to an insult, implying the insult is so bad it's taken a year off your life.

"Raquel, that was so rude! I'm wiping a year from my eye"

by massivedong32 December 16, 2021

wiping my ass

1. Dismissing an action from one's attention
2. To be done, or finished with a situation.

Similar to "I'm washing my hands of the situation"

"Yo Jordan, did you hear about the test grades?! The average was below a 40%."

"Yea, I'm wiping my ass of that one. This class beats calculus though"

by Urban yahtzee May 28, 2018

Wiping Hair

Long hair found on a female, primarily used to wipe jizz from the face of a "lady" following the oral stimulation of her "friend's" sex organ / weapon of love.

For example
Alan used Petra's WIPING HAIR to clean up her face after the mess he'd made.

by Esteban Tuero June 9, 2004

Wiping a brown marker

When you're wiping your ass and it never seems to stop.

Last night, I was wiping a brown marker for fifteen minutes.

by Ghettomemester May 26, 2017