schmeck

Unit of time it takes for a duck to urinate.

"just give me one quick schmeck"

by underock January 29, 2024

schmeck off

to fuck off, get out, die, depart the mortal coil

Schmeck off, dicklick!

Schmeck off and die!

by ablancon December 27, 2021

jared schmeck

“Jared Schmeck" is the yellow discharge from the top of a penis infected with an STD.

I fucked this skank at a DMB concert and now I have this smelly Jared Schmeck on my dick.

by EverybodyPanic December 27, 2021

30 sec schmeck

When a girl gives you a hand job in a movie for only thirty seconds only allowing half an erection to be achieved.

Justin: How was that date at the movies last night?

Billy: Well I had a 30 sec schmeck

Justin: Wow it was that bad?

Billy: Yea

by press B for Blackman May 25, 2010

Schmuckers Slap

When one recruits a dog and a human to have a sexual escapade with them.

Process:
1. Acquire some Smuckers Jelly (Concord Grape is preferable)
2. Paste it all over your hand
3. Rear the hand back all the way in order for the Slap to be most effective
4. Slap it on the ass real good and rub it in
5. Leave the Jelly on for 10 seconds before having your dog lick it up
6. Enjoy.

Man I want to get a schmuckers slap right now.
I just got schmucked.
We are schmucking right now.

by AnonymousPseudonym10 October 8, 2018

schmuckbag

A person so unbecoming that it makes a douchebag look good. A human that would be more productive as a tackling dummy for Ndamukong Suh.

There is no chance in hell that I will have dinner with that schmuckbag.

by Seddy Mazel April 11, 2016

Schmuck

Schmuck - Someone who is more than an idiot

Luke, you're a schmuck!

by SchmuckCentral February 4, 2019