schmear

Verb: to rub one's (usually naked) rear against any surface such as the carpet, wall, chair in a smooth slow flick movement.
Noun : the unwanted substance occasionally, regrettably, deposited on a surface as a consequence of performing a schmear.

Not to be confused with smear.

Verb: Darling! Don't you dare schmear on your brother's chair!
Noun: Mummy! Zoe just left a big schmear on my seat and I just SAT on it and it's DISGUSTING

by IHateCleaningUpShit July 21, 2013

Schmear

Noun: The crystalline residue that forms on the smooth plastic surface of a cellular telephone display by one’s ear during a call. If the display is not wiped off on one’s pant leg after each use, schmear will solidify into the characteristic hardened crystalline coating. Schmear will require the application of a solvent, sometimes saliva, to restore the normal appearance of the display. Also spelled Schm-Ear.

Dude, the schmear on my phone was so bad I had to lick it off to see who was calling.

by Mike G October 18, 2005

Schmear

A derrogatory term used before a word to signify importance.

Carla, you are such a schmear bitch.
Matt, you have a schmear camel toe.

by Alexwaetweg October 3, 2007

german schmear

Verb. When one rubs a white substance(jizz) to cover up an existing facade (face).

Chuck decided that the only way to update Kyle's appearance was to give him an immaculate German schmear.

by Wealcattty October 15, 2017

butt schmear

when a dog scoots it's butt across the floor in order to excrete it's anal glands often leaving a residue of poo in it's wake...

My dog Willis butt schmeared across the floor yesterday and we had to clean up all the shit left behind...it was gross.

by beckyboo April 7, 2014

Hammer Schmear

A little dollop of thick smegma under the penile foreskin.

She looked so pretty with a bit of my hammer schmear on her upper lip.

I need to wash the hammer schmear a little better. It stinks.

by Dick Onchin October 13, 2020

German Schmear

When you are ass fucking a chick doggie style, and after pulling out, you wipe the shit of your dick and schmear it across her upper lip, former a 'Hitler' stash.

"I surprised my one-night stand with a German schmear... I haven't heard from her since."

by German Schmear April 21, 2022