"I'm so sorry. I had sex with your father 20 times and your brother 13 times during our marriage, and there is a chance you are not our babies daddy!"
"Today on Maury: Our 12 year old guests reveal to their parents they are prostitutes!"
"Today on Maury: Our 12 year old guests reveal to their parents they are prostitutes!"
by Meijer's! January 3, 2006
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maurey • Maureya • The Maurey Povich • maureen • maury • Maury Povich • maurel • maury show • marey • mauriyah
Daytime "talk" show hosted by TV personality Maury Povich. Topics are limited, but incredibly entertaining, specifically paternity tests. Only show topics ever done nowadays are-
1) - Paternity Tests
The best! See you are not the father
2) - Cheaters Revealing Secrets
If your significant other wanted to bring you on the Maury Show to reveal a "deep secret", what the hell do you think it is? Geez!
3) - Cheaters Denying Cheating
Maury: Lashawn, we asked you if you had sex with 40 women since you have been with Nykesha. You said 'no', the lie detector test determined that was a lie, it was actually 125.
Nykesha: You done! Dat's it! You out! Get out my house!
Lashawn: Dat test iz wrong! I ain't nevah cheated!
4) - Fat Babies
Jenny: My son is 2 years old and weighs 115 lbs. I feed him Snickers, Ho-ho's, steak, chicken, whatever he wants! He's my child and I'ma raise him!
5) - I Used to Be Ugly...
Maury: Joe, do you remember Cecila?
Joe: Yeah, she was the ugliest girl in school
Maury: Well, she's changed alot since then, look at her now!
*Cecila, tummy tuck, boob job, 2000 lbs. of makeup and all comes out and dances seductively for the crowd
Cecila: I'm hot and sexy now though the miracles of 40 plastic surgeries!
6) - My 10 year old is out of control!
Mom: Maury, you have to help my daughter!
Daughter: I'm only 10 years old and I do what I want. I swear, drink, and steal. I even kicked my mom in the head once! Nobody tells me what to do!
Mom: *sobs*
Crowd: Boooooo!
Daughter: Whateva! Whateva! Y'all don' know me! Y'all don' know me!
Maury: Guess what? You're going to boot camp!
Crowd: Yayyyyy!
Big Black Guy (to daughter): Sit down! Shut up! Apologize to your mother now! Shut your mouth! *yell, yell yell*
Daughter (2 days later): I'm so sorry Mom *sob* *sob*, I love you!!
1) - Paternity Tests
The best! See you are not the father
2) - Cheaters Revealing Secrets
If your significant other wanted to bring you on the Maury Show to reveal a "deep secret", what the hell do you think it is? Geez!
3) - Cheaters Denying Cheating
Maury: Lashawn, we asked you if you had sex with 40 women since you have been with Nykesha. You said 'no', the lie detector test determined that was a lie, it was actually 125.
Nykesha: You done! Dat's it! You out! Get out my house!
Lashawn: Dat test iz wrong! I ain't nevah cheated!
4) - Fat Babies
Jenny: My son is 2 years old and weighs 115 lbs. I feed him Snickers, Ho-ho's, steak, chicken, whatever he wants! He's my child and I'ma raise him!
5) - I Used to Be Ugly...
Maury: Joe, do you remember Cecila?
Joe: Yeah, she was the ugliest girl in school
Maury: Well, she's changed alot since then, look at her now!
*Cecila, tummy tuck, boob job, 2000 lbs. of makeup and all comes out and dances seductively for the crowd
Cecila: I'm hot and sexy now though the miracles of 40 plastic surgeries!
6) - My 10 year old is out of control!
Mom: Maury, you have to help my daughter!
Daughter: I'm only 10 years old and I do what I want. I swear, drink, and steal. I even kicked my mom in the head once! Nobody tells me what to do!
Mom: *sobs*
Crowd: Boooooo!
Daughter: Whateva! Whateva! Y'all don' know me! Y'all don' know me!
Maury: Guess what? You're going to boot camp!
Crowd: Yayyyyy!
Big Black Guy (to daughter): Sit down! Shut up! Apologize to your mother now! Shut your mouth! *yell, yell yell*
Daughter (2 days later): I'm so sorry Mom *sob* *sob*, I love you!!
by ACG2x September 21, 2004
Get the maury show mug.Maurene is a very loving person. She will do everything for her love ones especially for her partner. Maurene's name is as unique as her. She the living idiom of a girl happened to be born on the right place and on the right time. She sometimes do some things that will do some troubles with his partner but she can easily find way to solve it back. If you are lonely, just look to her smile and you will attract to her positivity, on the other side, she is a short-tempered person. She will be easily annoyed on small things but food will always solve the girls problem. This girl was hurt once and she will do everything so that it will never happened again on her life. She is so generous, kind, loving, and a jolly person. She also have a good taste in fashion, she is very creative, good at dancing and singing. The way she smiles makes her partner fall again everytime.
by Nebuchadnezzar_ January 30, 2020
Get the maurene mug.A daytime talk show in which individuals, couples and families air their personal problems to a national audience in a typically entertaining fashion. Various topics and issues explored include paternity testing, cheating spouses and lovers, and out of control children.
On a typical paternity episode:
'Maury, I ain't 100, I a 1000 percent sure he my baby daddy!'
'Do you think he looks like your son?'
'Sure, look at the lips, look at the nose, he's her daddy!'
'Let's bring out Sharnel!'
(Boooo)
"She a ho, she a ho, I ain't Laronda's baby daddy, she a ho!"
There is very little deviation in the dialogue from episode to episode.
On a typical paternity episode:
'Maury, I ain't 100, I a 1000 percent sure he my baby daddy!'
'Do you think he looks like your son?'
'Sure, look at the lips, look at the nose, he's her daddy!'
'Let's bring out Sharnel!'
(Boooo)
"She a ho, she a ho, I ain't Laronda's baby daddy, she a ho!"
There is very little deviation in the dialogue from episode to episode.
by Milton66 June 21, 2009
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A corruption of the word Retard and the name of a television show host Maury Povich.
A person whom has appeared on the Maury Povich Show to recieve paternity test results for themselves.
This term can be used as an insult to describe someone who is loud, irresponsible, sexually indescriminate slutmanwhore stupid or uneducated.
A person whom has appeared on the Maury Povich Show to recieve paternity test results for themselves.
This term can be used as an insult to describe someone who is loud, irresponsible, sexually indescriminate slutmanwhore stupid or uneducated.
by Offshore_Remains December 23, 2010
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