Emergency Landing

When you have to shit so bad that you start crapping before your cheeks actually make contact with the toilet seat. Usually involves a running start with pants down.

Dude, i payed the price for eating all those burritos last night. I just barely pulled off an emergency landing when i got home.

by phattypatty_33 September 15, 2009

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Landing Pad

A layer of toilet paper (usually somewhere between 3 and 8 pieces) laid down on the surface of water within the toilet bowl before one has a bowel movement. This layer of toilet paper, or ‘landing pad’, serves a 3-fold purpose: (1) To prevent the dreaded splashback effect caused by the fecal displacement of water; (2) To soften the “KER-PLUNK!” sound that often occurs when feces breaks the surface tension of the water (this is particularly effective because the toilet paper disables the properties of water’s surface tension by acting as a semi-permeable membrane, a sort of dampening medium between water and air; further, the speed of the displacement of the water is lessened, which makes for a much softer noise); and (3) To bring about an awareness of the TP supply before use, negating any chance that one might have a bowel movement, only to look over and notice that there is no toilet paper.

Johnny: "Dude, I went to meet my girlfriend's parents for the first time last night. Halfway through the night I realised that I needed to take a massive dump, which was uncomfortable because the bathroom was next to the living room where they were sitting, and the house was dead quiet"

Billy: "No way, man... what did you do?"

Johnny: "I built a wicked landing pad, so not only did they not hear me, but I was also able to stay as dry as a cracker for the whole experience. What a night it was!"

by JPaps January 8, 2011

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another happy landing

Phrase used to indicate that a ship has landed sucessfully. One of many obi-one liners

*crashes starship into the ground*
"Another happy landing"

by Lumpyland69 February 7, 2017

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Lanier Middle School

-The deepest pit of hell
-Filled with assholes and gangster wannabies, with a few sluts sprinkeled in for good measure
-The teachers are either awesome or they suck
-If you can't pretend you're rich, you will be shunned by people who can
-some douche spread poop on the walls in the boys bathroom spring 2011 and now the administration thinks all boys are troublemakers
-YOU WILL HAVE AT LEAST ONE SEXIST TEACHER!!
-A grouping for all the posers in northern VA, with some poor sorry bastards thrown in against their will

Mom: "Hey, honey how was school?"
Student: "Same old, same old."
Mom: "OH NO! It was THAT BAD?"
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Lanier Middle School
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by The_Messanger_Of_Darkness August 12, 2011

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