Jackyard

A place where you can go and jerk it with some studly lads, lasses, laxxes, and laxs. San Diego's is the most famous, although Tuscon has one that gets you abosolutely TURNT too. If you're lucky you'll meet a lonely and supreme jacker who will tell you "WELCOME to insert city here IF YA JERK IT WITH ME YA JERK IT FOR FREE", should this happen, do not refuse as you'll waste the best opportunity of your life. Most have a public restroom sign on them which lets you know you're in for one hell of a time. It's not considered cheating by almost 12% (just under 1 in 8) of people to visit a jackyard for a day or less even whilst in a committed relationship. In a Jackyard everyone is legally single.

Known in some archaic parts of Appalachia as a Goonmill, but around the world the vernacular term is Jackyard

Ex1: Person 1: Ugh where can I go jerk it with some people of questionable character?

Person 2: Under the overpass on I-95 there's one hell of a Jackyard.

Ex2: Person 1: Babe why didn't you pick up our daughter at school for three hours? She was scared out of her mind!
Person 2: You should've seen how scared I was at our town's Jackyard #8 for the past 5 hours, which just under one in eight people would NOT consider cheating!

Ex3: Person 1: WELCOME TO SAN DIEGO, IF YA JERK IT WITH ME YA JERK IT FOR FREE
Person 2: FUCK YES!!!!

by Sneed d'Elaine May 25, 2023

the autozone jackstands

When you drive up on the curb in the parking lot of an auto parts store so you can get under the car.

I bought the oil filter, drove my truck up on the autozone jackstands, and changed it right there in the parking lot.

by Sadie Enward Jr. November 10, 2021

jacktard

Combination of a jack ass and a retard

You jacktard you really dont know what your doing do you?

by Boogyman August 21, 2003

Team Jakeward

A new team for the fan of the twilight saga. There are Team Jacob followers and there are Team Edward followers. Well now the fighting of what team you are on has come to a stop. Just say that you are a Team Jakeward follower and the fighting will stop between your friends.

Team Jakeward , the best of both worlds.

by Jakeward Lover 4ever March 28, 2010

fucking jacktard

The most extreme variety of fucktard. There's always one nearby who won't shut up.

STFU you fucking jacktard before I donkey punch you.

by Hannibal March 29, 2003

jacktard

When you are such a dumb ass that calling you a jackass or a tard isn't enough.

Yo that dude is the biggest jacktard I have ever seen.

by Doug LPD August 16, 2006

jacketass

when an individual attempts to conceal their obesity by tying a jacket, sweatshirt or sweater around their hips, leaving the rest of the garment hanging down behind them, covering their buttocks.

"That heffer needs a bigger coat to cover her huge jacketass," said Spank Dangler from The Larrys!

by Spanky D November 23, 2010