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Turtle Dick

The uncontrollable full retraction of the male penis, leaving Just Nuts.

As in a Turtle pulling his head back inside of his shell.

Causes: Cold Water, Fright, Koo Ko Girlfriends or Wives.
Rieko went koo ko and screamed at me in front of thousands of people at Disneyland and before you know it, I had Turtle Dick.
by DrGenetics March 25, 2008
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turtle dick

1. An uncircumsised dick. As in the way it looks b/c of the foreskin, like a turtle that is in its shell.
2. the first words my friend said when he saw my uncircumsised dick.
person 1: dude, im not circumsised...
person 2: ohhh, you have a turtle dick huh?
by john November 19, 2004
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Turtle Dick

by jack the ripper ek February 15, 2012
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ninja turtle dick

a very small, almost non-existent penis resembling that of a ninja turtle action figure
julie was disappointed the first time she saw mikes penis. It was so small. She couldnt believe he had a ninja turtle dick
by aiofub September 19, 2009
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Turtle Dick

When a circumcised penis retracts into the remaining foreskin scar or shaft.
It's so cold, I'm turtle dicking.
Sorry, I was adjusting my turtle dick.
by CORich September 3, 2012
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Turtle dick

Someone that takes a long time to get an erection
"did you sleep with tom last night?"
"no, he had a turtle dick."
by Hairyboy2000 January 28, 2015
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Turtle Dick

Besides when cold or dehydrated, it's also a common side effect of doing to many stimulants like adderal or cocaine. Your penis shrivels up and gets hard from the vasoconstriction, and retreats into itself like a turtle into its shell. You are also basically impotent during this turtle dick state.
I'd love to have sex with you but I took 100 mg of adderal and I've got turtle dick.
by Turtledick Eqsquire March 27, 2025
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