A crust that is so crunchy and perfect that any, and all, desires for another food to be eaten that day are null and void
"That chicken sandwich that Joshua Weissman made the other day was so dang CRUSSY, I couldn't even take another bite of the KFC sandwich I ordered." - Vicram
Similar to a dingle-berry, a crusty cling-on is a dried up piece of poo that gets caught up in an unkempt and unwashed hairy ass of a man. Or a woman that has a hairy ass, though that's more of a rarity.
Dude I used a whole roll of toilet paper after the dump I left in the can last night but still got crusty cling-ons hanging off my ring beard!
A Crusty Balloon is when one jizzes on their sexual partner’s breasts if female, testicles if male; Following the act of ejaculation the partner proceeds to let the semen air dry. Once the cum is dry and flaky, if ejaculate can be removed from vigorous punches to the breasts, crusty balloons have been achieved.
Doug and Sasha passed out at the party and we woke them up with with a round of crusty balloons, each.