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substitute

Also called "sub", the poor person, either fresh out of college or old and retired, who fills in for absent teachers. The sub can expect to be ridiculed and tortured by bitch-ass 7th graders who will do anything in their power not to finish an easy worksheet left them by their teacher. The sub is basically a $55/day babysitter.
Bitch-ass kid: Ah hell yeah we got a substitute today! We ain't doin shit! Hey Mister, uhh...Mister!(kid can't read last name on the board because he's an illiterate degenerate) Can I go to da bafroom?
by Zach "Mr." Cress January 25, 2006
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substitute person

1. A person who is the replacement for a significant other, relative, or friend that isn't around anymore.

2. Derived from a quote by Claire from Elizabethtown.
"You and I have a special talent," Claire says to Drew. "And I saw it immediately. We're the substitute people. I've been the substitute person my whole life. I'm not an Ellen a co-worker Drew was into. I never wanted to be an Ellen. And I'm not a Cindy either…I like being alone too much. I mean, I'm with a guy who is married to his academic career. I rarely see him and I'm the substitute person there. I like it that way. It's a lot less pressure."

"Since Anne just broke up with Joe, Emily is Joe's substitute person."
by XVIII December 9, 2008
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Subsistentialism

The philosophical approach emphasizing the ontological relationship between an existentialist and his personal-use crops.
"Johnny won't share any of his bell peppers; he's into subsistentialism."
by Aristotle-FuckYeah October 1, 2009
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Substitute teacher

The most foolish kind of species of teachers are substitute teachers. THEY ARE FUCKING STUPID... LIKE REALLY FUCKING STUPID. They make you wet your pants.
Substitute teacher: So, what do you normally do in class?
Students: We eat pizza and watch Netflix all-day *quietly pissing their pants of laughter*
*AWKWARD SILENCE*
SUBSTITUTE TEACHER: Ok, then let's do that
by ILL BE THERE November 19, 2019
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Substitute Teacher

Great to have cover your lessons at school in Years 7 to 9, but once you hit GCSE level in Year 10 to 11, it is a bit of a piss-take at how unqualified some teachers can be.
Example...

Year 7 : What? Miss isn't in?? SCORE!! We have a Substitute teacher!!!

Year 11 : What? Miss isn't in? Great, I'm gonna fail my exams now we have a Substitute teacher!
by HappyGirl1993 October 25, 2010
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hand substitute

1. When a person becomes bored with masturbating with ones own hand, and experiments with external objects.

2. Vagina or penis
Tom: After masturbating for 30 years I think its time to find a hand substitute.
Jerry: Maybe you shouldn't be a 40 year old virgin
by Don Pavlic August 17, 2011
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Slang Substitute

A slang substitute is a word, words or phrase that may be used interchangeably with a definition already defined on Urban Dictionary. However, the Slang Substitute may not yet be defined. Slang Substitutes must be clearly noted within the definition of an existing slang term for it be a valid substitute. The beauty of a Slang Substitute is that even if the term is later defined, it still remains a valid Slang Substitute for the term in which it was noted to mean the same thing. Adding Slang Substitutes within definitions saves time and allows more creative slang terminology.
The term Bone In Filet means a tight ass ready for anal play. The term Bone In Ham, while not defined as such, may be used interchangeably to mean the same as Bone In Filet because its noted as a Slang Substitute withing the definition of Bone In Filet.
by Eaton Holgoode February 23, 2014
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