A way of saying that someone looks stoned in the midlands.

A recent study found that 7/10 potheads in Herefordshire used this while telling a friend they looked fucked in the venue.
pearl: Mate you look absolutely fucking pretzeled!

Bouncer: Hey Chaps! I overheard you talking about pretzels. No food allowed in the venue.

Rocco: No. Don't worry mate, it wasn't food.

Before they could blink they were sitting in the back of the police car looking absolutely pretzeled without any pretzels.
by Some person July 30, 2017
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An imminent threat. Has struck once. Failed. Will strike again.
Afghani terrorists planted pretzels in America. So Bush invaded Iraq.
by Danielle January 5, 2005
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a pretzel is a salty, sometimes chocolate covered snack food made of crisscrossing dough. also a highly dangerous terrorist weapon used in an assassination attempt on the 43rd president George "Dubya" Bush.
He choked on a pretzel?!?!?!
by blaarg June 21, 2007
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A dry and pretentious person, a pretzel is used as a metaphor. This is because pretzel snacks have pretended to be the healthier alternative to potato chips for years, when in fact, then have more calories per gram. Pretzels are also dry and flavorless; this matches the description of a person perfectly. Furthermore, pretzels are usually salted; a salty person is usually unpleasant.
The captain of the football team is such a pretzel. He think he's king, but the only reason the talentless wretch got on the team is because the coach is his dad. And I suppose that's why he's captain, too.
by Yo Damn Face's What December 13, 2010
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a trick in freestyle skiing in which the skiier approaches a rail and jumps and spins 270 degrees in one direction and lands, sliding the length of the rail and then stops thier momentum and throws it back the other direction and spins the opposite way 270 degrees and stomps it...
you see tom wallich the other day?

no, why?

he was throwin pretzels left and right bro. he's a god!!!

by snufelupagus April 2, 2008
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n.
(PRET-zuhl)
a small, salty, usually crunchy baked piece of.. pretzel.
Comes in an infinite amount of shapes to guarantee you'll buy them.
It is said they originated from a priest who made them to reward children for saying prayers correctly.
They attempted to rise up and assasinate our dictator, Dubya, but sadly they failed and we'll all die.
Oh, and some are covered in chocolate too.
mmmm...
-I ate a pretzel.
-pretzels are nice
by =^..^= December 5, 2004
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a male who, upon a post-hookup facebook check or upon hearing comments from witnesses of said hookup, turns out to be somewhat less attractive than one originally thought; often characterized by the taste of a pretzel.
Girl 1: Um yeah, he kind of tasted like a pretzel.
Girl 2: He looked like a pretzel.

"That Patrick - he turned out to be a real pretzel."
by girl 1 February 12, 2007
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