At least I'm not rubbing penises all over myself

"At least I'm not rubbing penises all over myself."
(Introspective)

"At least YOU'RE....."
(Outrospective)

-Phrase meaning "It could always be worse..." or "I could be doing worse things right now."

Examples of At least I'm not rubbing penises all over myself.

A) Reassuring; In a bad situation used to remind another that "it could be worse." (Ex: "I know your life is chaotic right now, and you're full of inner pain....But at least you're not rubbing penises all over yourself.)

B) Optimistic; Use to reassure oneself that "It's not that bad." {Ex: "Even though I have no money, no job, no car, no girl...at least I'm not rubbing penises all over myself.")

C) Derogatory; Used to insinuate homosexuality in a straight friend. (Ex: "I may be having sex with a fat chick...BUT at least IM not rubbing PENISES ALL OVER MYSELF...GARY!")

by Eric Vilenica, Cody Hausner, Mike Pope January 11, 2009

At least buy me a drink first.

Oftenly used when one person implies something sexual or something that sounds sexual. Could also be used when someone touches an intimate body part like the ass or tits, this could be an accident or on purpose.

Diego: *Trips and accidentally touches ass*
Julia: Wow, at least buy me a drink first.

by Dakiji February 18, 2019

at least i have my orange juice

a creative and subtle way of saying that you're going to have a shitty day (derived from a florida orange juice commercial).

John: I got an email saying the professor would post our grades today.

Mike: at least I have my orange juice...

by AngryAtom January 20, 2011

At least you don't have gangrene

Really puts things in perspective.

'Man, I can't believe I got a D on my algebra test...'

'Hey, at least you don't have gangrene.'

by skittlekitty2227 October 16, 2011

At least I'm not Kanye West

This is a ""cop out" phrase you use if you've done something absolutely terrible. However, whatever you did probably isn't worse than the stupid sh*t Kanye does on a daily basis.

"You are a son of a bitch, you slapped a child, and stole a cop car while high on PCP"
"Yeah, well at least I'm not Kanye West"
"True"

"I can't believe you, You clubbed a baby seal, then drove over it in a Hummer H2"
"Well at least I'm not Kanye West"
"Sh*t you're right, next round is on me!" - Al Gore

by GitzMoney December 8, 2010

at least I have sex

Said by someone who is not very involved in some activity routinely as an answer to "look what can I do in (insert the activity here)! You cannot do something like that!" line.
Most common used when someone is boasting about his computer/gaming skills.

-Hey! Look at this cool program I wrote! Can you do that?
-no, but at least I have sex...

by ...:::HTMLCODER.exe:::... August 6, 2008

at least your pretty

When someone is pretty but really stupid

Sam: 5+5=99
Jesse: that's wrong but at least your pretty

by Potato_warrior123 December 5, 2016