Coughed in my coffee maker

When one person sucks a fart out of someone else’s butt and blows it into the first persons mouth

The barista gasped when Jeff coughed in my coffee maker.

by Randi&Jeff October 25, 2025

Dirty Coffee

When your wife pulls the possum butt plug out of your ass and shoved it straight in your mouth, whilst she squeals like a possum.

My wife gave me a dirty coffee yesterday

by Red Neck Devil May 4, 2023

Fly Coffee

When you drink coffee thats sat out for a few days, maybe even a week, and there is a boat load of flys maggots ect. ready for you to drink!

Damn Son, that coffee's a couple days old, you really want to drink that shit?

Dad its fly coffee, at least Im getting protein!

by 8bitmodern January 12, 2020

california coffee pot

shitting in the outdoors

on my hike, I went for a california coffee pot, and cleaned up with some leaves

by itsnotmeiswearr October 28, 2020

english coffee

A euphemism used by office workers when going to the pub to grab a pint (typically beer). Whilst drinking at work may be frowned upon, grabbing coffee with your fellow colleagues is widely socially acceptable. Hence English Coffee.

"English" can also be commonly replaced with "Russian" or "Irish", though these are considered less subtle and may blow one's cover.

"I had a long day mate, Lets grab an English coffee this afternoon."

by salary man December 14, 2023

floor coffee

When you dump coffee grounds all over the floor at the same time that your floor is flooded with water.

I tried to make a batch of cold brew while doing laundry, but I ended up making a house full of floor coffee.

by LaceARoo June 17, 2018

Coffee-beaned

Instead of coffee making you shit, the coffee is so good, it violently shits a visceral, fat, steamy shit, because it hates you and your family. Including your dog or cat (or goldfish).

That coffee was so good, I got coffee-beaned.

by wowzuhsss October 25, 2025