When the Edinburgh Fringe is imminent and you're so uncontrollably excited that you just have to touch yourself.
Dave was so aroused by the Fringe 2015 programme that he had to lock himself in his bedroom due to a severe case of the Festival Wanks.
When Dave found out that extra shows were being added he had to take a week off from work as he found himself suffering from a crippling repetitive stain injury.
#festivalwanks
When Dave found out that extra shows were being added he had to take a week off from work as he found himself suffering from a crippling repetitive stain injury.
#festivalwanks
by Denny Duquette May 12, 2015

Broden: Hey Mark how did that interview go?
Mark: Sorry mate, i can't talk now. I'm having a spank-wank.
Broden: Ah shit. It went that bad.
Mark: Sorry mate, i can't talk now. I'm having a spank-wank.
Broden: Ah shit. It went that bad.
by Weenus Waggler August 26, 2016

by Benny June 23, 2004

This is what Sweaty nutsack of M365 received from Jess.
Sweaty chased Jess all around the forum, pining for her attention. One day they met up and she gave him a half wank.
Sweaty chased Jess all around the forum, pining for her attention. One day they met up and she gave him a half wank.
Sweaty nutsack could only manage a half wank while he was watching his new wife being pounded by her ex.
by Just a bloke from London June 24, 2011

whilst feeling the thrilling excitement of riding a roller coaster causing the symptoms of sexual stimulation.
That coaster-wank was amazing!
by grannyfapple April 9, 2015

An act of self pleasure that includes visual stimulation provided by a special interest magazine or other print media but does not involve the playback of electronic media. In decline since 1994 and notably affected by the widespread adoption of broadband technology.
Dude, my broadband is down again, I'll have to dust off my emergency copy of <insert special interest magazine here> and go for an analog wank instead.
by Ice in the cider April 14, 2011

by AphFranceNeedsToStop April 17, 2016
