by Tommo The Tomlinson May 12, 2019
Get the Irish Princessmug. 1) Billy: did you get any last night?
Jon: No, she wouldn't even give me an Irish
2) billy: Damnit dude, I'm all out of jergens, looks like I'm giving myself an Irish tonight
Jon: No, she wouldn't even give me an Irish
2) billy: Damnit dude, I'm all out of jergens, looks like I'm giving myself an Irish tonight
by Papi Himself November 5, 2013
Get the an irishmug. A story, usually told by one of Irish descent, that may have a clear beginning and end but takes drastic, seemingly pointless turns throughout. The story is, in all likelihood, also completely bullshit, but not necessarily. Elements of the story may also just be exaggerated for comedic or dramatic effect, leaving the story to otherwise be truthful.
Popularized by the SleepyCabin Podcast, but likely familiar to anyone of Irish descent.
Popularized by the SleepyCabin Podcast, but likely familiar to anyone of Irish descent.
SleepyCast E9
NIALL: This is how tragic my life is: My dad used to take me out fishing, and we used to go about five times each summer for years, and we never once caught a fish between us. But, like, I was so bad at it that once, I pissed my pants, and my dad was so disappointed that we didn't catch a fish and that I pissed my pants.
ZACH: Did you piss your pants because you didn't catch a fish, or were you nervous? What'd you piss your pants for?
NIALL: I just pissed my pants.
JEFF: What is it with these stories Irishmen tell? "This one time I went to the lake and...I pissed my pants, then uh...someone threw a rock at me. The end!" I don't know what it is with these stories you guys-...you and Chris are like: "This one time I was running down the road, and there was a bug, and I stepped on it, and someone...spit in my eye. I had the worst day ever because someone spit in my eye!"
STAMPER: THAT'S SO TRUE!! THAT IS SO TRUE!!! Your stories are so all over the place!
NIALL: But...if you let me finish my story, it wouldn't be so all over the fucking place!
STAMPER: IT ALREADY IS ALL OVER THE PLACE!!
...
STAMPER: Oh, my God, dude, Niall. If you were a hitman, you would be like, "Alright, so I went up to the top of the bell tower...and I had the guy in my sight...and then I put my gun down and I ate a chocolate bar...and then I went back and..." It's like, what does the chocolate bar have to do with you killing somebody? THOSE ARE IRISH STORIES!!"' (Irish Story)
NIALL: This is how tragic my life is: My dad used to take me out fishing, and we used to go about five times each summer for years, and we never once caught a fish between us. But, like, I was so bad at it that once, I pissed my pants, and my dad was so disappointed that we didn't catch a fish and that I pissed my pants.
ZACH: Did you piss your pants because you didn't catch a fish, or were you nervous? What'd you piss your pants for?
NIALL: I just pissed my pants.
JEFF: What is it with these stories Irishmen tell? "This one time I went to the lake and...I pissed my pants, then uh...someone threw a rock at me. The end!" I don't know what it is with these stories you guys-...you and Chris are like: "This one time I was running down the road, and there was a bug, and I stepped on it, and someone...spit in my eye. I had the worst day ever because someone spit in my eye!"
STAMPER: THAT'S SO TRUE!! THAT IS SO TRUE!!! Your stories are so all over the place!
NIALL: But...if you let me finish my story, it wouldn't be so all over the fucking place!
STAMPER: IT ALREADY IS ALL OVER THE PLACE!!
...
STAMPER: Oh, my God, dude, Niall. If you were a hitman, you would be like, "Alright, so I went up to the top of the bell tower...and I had the guy in my sight...and then I put my gun down and I ate a chocolate bar...and then I went back and..." It's like, what does the chocolate bar have to do with you killing somebody? THOSE ARE IRISH STORIES!!"' (Irish Story)
by munchiesnOOb September 15, 2021
Get the Irish Storymug. anyone whos ever seen an irish dick knows its anything but small most irishmen are bigger the average size.
by McDaniel R January 17, 2008
Get the Irish cockmug. by Ubeenbamboozledson December 27, 2021
Get the Irish Exitmug. The Myth: People with Big Blue Eyes & Dark Hair. Irish & Roman Catholic decent. Pretty much the most stunning combination wether it be on a Lady or a Gent. The Unicorns of the Human World.
by Ol Blue Eyes October 26, 2014
Get the The Black Irishmug. Many centuries ago, the Irish were the most advanced race on earth. Legend has it they were on the verge of transcending to become beings of pure energy, when they discovered alcohol and...well you know the rest.
On the bright side, they invented stout, potatoes, and whiskey
On the bright side, they invented stout, potatoes, and whiskey
Peter Griffin, from the Griffin family in Family Guy, is Irish. So is Gerry Adams, the IRA and Irish Whiskey
by b0Bz0r3llo February 10, 2005
Get the the Irishmug.