Masturbation Formula

The formula for creating a vague innuendo for masturbation.

Verb+Infinitive(the)+Any Noun

Guy 1: I'm gonna go punch the clown for a little bit.

Guy 2: What??

Guy 1: You know... choke the chicken, mow the cougar, beat the meat? Whatever I'm gonna go masturbate.

Guy2: Why didn't you just say so?

Guy 1: Cuz I'm using the masturbation formula!

by CrackerManDelux August 8, 2009

masturbation

Masturbation is a healthy excercise which is done by(and this is a fact)94% of male population and 70% of female population. Nicknames:five-finger shuffle,mastering the joystick,answering the bone-a-phone,stroking the salami,bobbing your balogna,choking the chickem,punishing the pigman,Erupting ol' faithful,pummeling the puppet, so on and so forth...

Guy: Masturbation is the greatest
Friend: I no man i punished the pied piper 7 times last night
Guy: pShhhhh i stroke the salami 24!

by Hans Schcwarz December 13, 2008

masturbation

The act of having sex by yourself, sort of. Chances are someone in your vicinity is doing it at this very moment.

Masturbation should be king.

by captainfugu December 30, 2008

Group masturbation

The act of three or more people jacking off or fingering themselves or others in the same room. This group maybe be of mixed genders or only one gender.

Jim: Dude, I was at Elliot's house the other day and he got some chicks to come over and jack us off.

John: Is there always group masturbation at Elliot's?

Jim: Yeah it's Elliot's house. Amazing things happen all the time.

by Jack Alof August 9, 2008

masturcation

synonym for mastabbatical; a shorter "vacation" from hands-on satisfaction (masturfaction)

He had been feeling tired during the day, so he decided he needed a short masturcation; he benefitted so much from his masturcation that he then went on a 3-month mastabbatical.

by Mr. Punderful January 14, 2014

Masturbation Burn

A blister/sore that occurs along the shaft after excessive masturbation.

After stroking for hours on end, Johnny developed Masturbation Burn.

by Ch@0s117 May 23, 2015

Masturbation Proclamation

Law of the land giving any person the ability to claim any object on which they masturbates onto as long as that is not already claimed.

"I now own this due to the essential rights given to me by the Masturbation Proclamation"

by Christmas cruises October 5, 2017