The real form of this phrase is similar to a masturbatory experience known as "The Stranger" (in which you sit on your hand until it is numb and masturbate so that it feels like someone else is doing it)
The only variance is that when doing a "Cactus Jack" you wait for partial numbness to restore until you feel the "Pins and needles" in your hand. You then masturbate and it feels like you're jacking off a real cactus.
Other Notes: It does not matter much if you reach climax during this as real cacti retain liquid and cannot orgasm.
Should you jack off a real cactus please seek immediate medical help.
The only variance is that when doing a "Cactus Jack" you wait for partial numbness to restore until you feel the "Pins and needles" in your hand. You then masturbate and it feels like you're jacking off a real cactus.
Other Notes: It does not matter much if you reach climax during this as real cacti retain liquid and cannot orgasm.
Should you jack off a real cactus please seek immediate medical help.
John was giving himself a stranger in the closet when suddenly it turned into a god awful Cactus Jack situation when the feeling in his hand came back. Next time John will sit on both of his hands before an attempt.
by Bongsc2 January 21, 2010
Get the Cactus Jack mug.A medical condition in males that stems from shaving the genitals, resulting in pubic hairs, in the early stages of their growth, to be prickly, itchy, and short, resembling the prickers on a cactus.
Friend 1: "Did you get to bang Nicole last night?"
Friend 2: "No man, she said I need to shave and get rid of that cactus cock. What a fucking bitch!"
Friend 2: "No man, she said I need to shave and get rid of that cactus cock. What a fucking bitch!"
by Matt Schroeder April 24, 2008
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Cackus
• Jackus Cackus
• cactus
• Cactus Jack
• Cactus Cock
• cactusing
• cockus
• cactus ass
• Cactus Pussy
• crackus
The result of pubic hair growing on the shaft of a penis that hasn't been shaved for 24 hours. Maxium effect of Cactus Dick occurs while inserting the penis during sex.
"What the hell Jason?! I thought I told you, last week, to shave your Cactus Dick before having anal with me!"
Spikey Pole, Hairy Shaft, Wool Coat
Spikey Pole, Hairy Shaft, Wool Coat
by MegaMan & Skrilla April 23, 2010
Get the Cactus Dick mug.Substance combination; Taking MDMA and Mescaline, be it by ingesting psychedelic cacti, tea, crude extract, clean extract by means of A/B extraction, or just mescaline itself (most likely synthetic).
by (Om) June 10, 2008
Get the Cactus flip mug.by crazii maisey January 4, 2009
Get the cactus crotch mug.A Condition Caused By Pubic Stubble On Either A Male Or Female, That Almost Always Irritates A Partner Who Is Trying To Be Intimate. Sometimes The Irritation Gets To The Point That Intercourse Must Discontinue.
When Teresa Shaved "Downtown" It Was So Sexy...But Since It's Been Two Weeks, She's Developed Cactus Crotch Syndrome.
by Manscaper2.0 March 14, 2010
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