monkey wank

1. A situation note entirely going the desired way.

2. Of something which is totally useless.

As the chief engineer watched the new bridge come crashing down on its first opening plunging 100 cars and occupents into the river below, he was heard to comment "This is turning into a pile of stale monkey wank"

by Norbert Colon October 15, 2004

wank

hardcore fish

softcore dogs are wimps

by serial fish. July 17, 2003

soapy wank

A Jack and Seven as your hole cards in a hand of Texas Hold 'em Poker.

With two 7's and a Jack on the flop and a Soapy Wank in the hand I had a full house.

by Poker December 28, 2005

Wanking the rhino

Rubbing a family heirloom to bring a specific instance of good luck to another person, e.g. for an exam or driving test.

I had a tough exam today but my sister was wanking the rhino so it should be OK.

I'm in court tomorrow so I'll ask my mum to wank the rhino.

by spiraldrain August 21, 2010

Piggy Wank

When you believe box tastes like coins so when you masterbate you suck on coins of various sizes

I had a piggy wank last night. Those coins taste so good

by Rufous May 14, 2015

infinity-wank

The infinity-wank is when you wank to a video of yourself wanking, then film it.

Then you can watch that video so you would be pleasuring yourself while watching yourself pleasure yourself.

You are free to choose how many layers deep you go. That's one of the rights afforded to you as a human and truly is the joy of the infinity-wank.

I'm really pleased with my new camera, it makes it really easy to do the infinity-wank

by Stjube January 22, 2014

Egg Wank

Cracking a raw egg over your penis for lubricant ehilst having a wank.

I just had a killer egg wank

by Steve_0z June 14, 2011