Schrodinger's cough

The winter cough that afflicts British folk, so called as it is both simultaneously serious enough to be nearly dying and needing antibiotics but simultaneously not bad enough to be COVID and in need of a PCR.

So called after Schrodinger's cat, a thought experiment in which a hypothetical cat may be considered simultaneously both alive and dead as a result of its fate being linked to a random subatomic event that may or may not occur.

"Remember that fella who wanted antibiotics the other day? Schrodinger's cough, couldn't be COVID so couldn't possibly go for a PCR"

by John Whitaker October 13, 2021

Schrodinger's asshat

Someone who denies that their head is up anyone's ass much less their own

You know that guy Roger? He's a Schrodinger's asshat, his head is so far up Jerry's ass, yet he denies it

by Åzüre March 13, 2023

Schrodinger's Faggot

As long as you can't see the penis of a trap , it is not considered gay.

A trap (tranny , transgender ) adaptation of the famous thought experiment by Erwin Schrödinger

"I came across nudes of this fine girl Gina McSoftcokk, but found that it's actually a tranny. Thank goodness the poster didn't post any full body pictures so Schrodinger's Faggot applied and I could jack it to her without straying from my straight sexuality. " - Desperate incel

by knikknax July 16, 2018

Schrodinger's Transphobe

When you offend a Transgender by calling them the correct pronouns when they haven't come out of the closet yet, but calling them their old pronouns would be misgendering them.

Person 1: Hey! Evelyn, right?
Person 2: Yo, don't say that out loud. I haven't told everyone else yet.
Person 1: So... it's Evan?
Person 2: No, don't be transphobic, I am no longer that gender.

Person 1 (Later): They were offended in both ways. I call it Schrodinger's Transphobe.

by Sagnag May 23, 2021

Schrodinger's Schlong

Your penis length is whatever you want it to be until you measure it.

Thanks to Schrodinger's Schlong, Johnny's penis was a solid 11 inches.

by Billy November 1, 2019

schrodinger's boyfriend

Common false spelling of schrödinger's boyfriend. Which means: He's both your boyfriend and not your boyfriend until the metaphorical box is opened.

Girl: "I have a boyfriend!" - Translation: I have schrodinger's boyfriend, demonstrate to me your high value and I'll like you anyway.

by CHorta13 September 16, 2017

Schrodinger's Retard

A person which says something retarded or stupid; then proceeds to cop out by saying "It's just a joke bro"

>"all you need to make a pipe bomb is redacted"
>>"You're the reason why gas cans have a combustible sign"
>"its just a joke bro"
>>"prime Schrodinger's Retard"

by Constanze Amalie July 6, 2023