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Definitions by TotallyDinosaur

Phillip’s Paradox 

When one has the desire to help a friend who has become unlikeable, but is battling with the desire to cut ties with a friend because they have become unlikeable.
Person 1: We should really give him some advice.
Person 2: But I dont wanna talk to someone like that.
Person 1: We’ve been caught in Phillip’s Paradox.

The Berlin Bird Effect 

The phenomenon of internet user coming up with either the most creative and hilarious comment you’ve ever seen, or the most brain dead and insufferable bullshit to tweet.
Person 1: *sees clever funny tweet and then an insufferable one directly after*
Person 2: The Berlin Bird Effects a bitch isn’t it.

Schrodinger’s beard 

When someone has a sizable amount of facial hair, but it still cannot be considered a beard. Usually common in high school boys and reddit moderators.
Person 1: I cant tell if that guy has a beard or not
Person 2: Yeah. He’s got a Schrodinger’s beard