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church pew

The WORST place to try and ease out a silient fart.It never works. The solid wood structure and conture of the pew acts like a piano sounding board,amplifying even the slightest whisper fart.
Always sit with a clenched butt on a church pew.
by wolfbait51 May 6, 2011
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ringing the church bells

the action of someone (inexperienced) jacking off a man's penis by painfully yanking on it. there is no pleasure derived from this sexual act, though the person ringing thinks they are administering pleasure.

the action resembles a monk/priest yanking down on the rope in order to ring a church's bells. in this scenario, the church bells are your balls, which are slapping each other with each yank.
Daniel: Hey man. Heard you hooked up with that freshman, Stephanie. How'd it go?

Andrew: Dude, it was terrible. She had no idea what to do. She was just ringing the church bells till I made her stop.

Daniel: Brutal. My condolences to your junk.
by UCLA_Chemical_Fungineer May 31, 2009
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Related Words

churchstreak

The number of consecutive visits to church each Sunday; usually said by people who play Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 because they relate it to the killstreak rewards in the game
Man, its Sunday, I gotta go to church. Well at least my churchstreak is now up to 5. Yes! I now have a predator missile!
by NWDAWG April 5, 2010
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Church's Chicken

Business chain started by George W. Church a former incubator salesman.

Church's Chicken offers quality fried chicken original and spicy as well as Honey-Butter Biscuits. Located on 2806 West Cermak Rd.
Person 1 "OHH THERES CHURCH'S CHICKEN!!!!"

Person 2 "CHUUUUUCHHHHHH!!!"
by Hotcakesss December 7, 2010
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Churchy

Description of someone is obsesses with church and is constantly talking about or going to church
Danni is such a churchy
by hehe vb June 29, 2005
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Sweatin' like a whore in church

Damn, it's hot today! I'm sweatin like a whore in church.

or:

When, I saw that cop pull out right after I ran that light, I was sweatin' like a whore in church. I thought he was gonna pull my ass over for sure.
by spokanevox March 27, 2009
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Churchill Martini

1. Gin served in a martini glass, usually shaken over ice.

Made popular by British Prime Minister Winston Churchill, who when once asked how much vermouth he would like in his martini, was quoted as replying
``I would like to observe the vermouth from across the room while I drink my martini.``
I`ll have a Churchill martini. And if you even so much as look at the vermouth, we`re going to have problems.
by Brett Caron December 17, 2008
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