Writing in 'Chav Speech' was actually invented for keyboards and typewriters as a means for taking quicker, easier and effective minutes in a meeting. - Original source: Mr J Swift.
Below is a perfect example of writing 'chav speech'.
if i reli wanted 2 talk proper on ere rite i wud cud but i dont wanna. it fairly obvious tat i can cos gd uni's dnt accpet thicko's. and puttin dear phil, well, just 2 inform u my dear sarcasm is the lowest form of wit and my education is seperate from my social life cos i consider it 2 be quite stuck up thinkin ur above sum1 just cos u speak proper. i have brains love i just exercise it as was n wen i need 2. oh n ur just as phsychic as me, sayin i can only talk in text speak, wen i can actually rite proper, liek i sed.
if i reli wanted 2 talk proper on ere rite i wud cud but i dont wanna. it fairly obvious tat i can cos gd uni's dnt accpet thicko's. and puttin dear phil, well, just 2 inform u my dear sarcasm is the lowest form of wit and my education is seperate from my social life cos i consider it 2 be quite stuck up thinkin ur above sum1 just cos u speak proper. i have brains love i just exercise it as was n wen i need 2. oh n ur just as phsychic as me, sayin i can only talk in text speak, wen i can actually rite proper, liek i sed.
by LearnSomethingNew March 29, 2009
Get the Chav Speech mug.1. adj., a phrase used to describe an odor so horrendous as to originate from a place not of this Earth, for example, Hell or Chicago.
2. adj., To have a rodent of abnormal size, crawl into one's mouth, die, be regurgitated, eaten, and breathed on you during conversation. See fart
2. adj., To have a rodent of abnormal size, crawl into one's mouth, die, be regurgitated, eaten, and breathed on you during conversation. See fart
1. That Tim, what a shit for brains, his ass smells of peanuts. What an ungodly stench!
2. Tim must've eaten a pile of fresh dog dung, 'cuz his breath is an ungodly stench.
2. Tim must've eaten a pile of fresh dog dung, 'cuz his breath is an ungodly stench.
by Amazing Gook January 26, 2004
Get the ungodly stench mug.Related Words
In business, this is a product, remote office, employee, etc., who doesn't get respect. The moniker stems from the popular slang phrase "beat you like a red-headed stepchild." Often times, the disrespect is undeserved.
If a product is an embarrassment to a company, it is the company's red-headed stepchild.
If a product is an embarrassment to a company, it is the company's red-headed stepchild.
The satellite office was outperforming the head office statistically, but because it created work for people in the head office, it was treated like a red-headed stepchild.
Because the Edsel didn't sell well, it became Ford's red-headed stepchild.
Because the Edsel didn't sell well, it became Ford's red-headed stepchild.
by Glenwood October 1, 2006
Get the Red-headed stepchild mug.Something that does not exist on the internet. All internet postings are at the sole discetion of the owner, regardless of the location of the server or person.
by Kung-Fu Jesus June 9, 2004
Get the free speech mug.The process or act of trying to filter or censor someones speech. An artificial device or unnatural mindset used to stop the inappropriate comments an individual makes when they lack a natural ability to filter their own thoughts, words, or action.
We're going to my grandma's house to try and find her checkbook or debit card will you please go on speech dialysis so she doesn't think that I hang out with nothing but Savages... don't want to arouse suspicion.
by Charlie Badass October 14, 2020
Get the speech dialysis mug.The speech given (usually to a guy) by a girl when he's started a relationship with her "best friend"
"Mate, i'm in deep shit... i spent last night with jane but i really am not intrested in a relationship"
"Yeah so what's wrong"
"Ellie gave me the best friend speech"
"she..."
"yeah..., the...'thing is...she's my best friend, if you fuck her around I will castrate you and stick your balls so far down your throat you'll be shitting cum for a month...' speech"
"Yeah so what's wrong"
"Ellie gave me the best friend speech"
"she..."
"yeah..., the...'thing is...she's my best friend, if you fuck her around I will castrate you and stick your balls so far down your throat you'll be shitting cum for a month...' speech"
by sickboy101 May 17, 2010
Get the The Best Friend Speech mug.A term given to a long and deliberate expulsion of gas from the anus after a meal, mainly a roast rich in veg, such as Christmas dinner etc, usually performed when in the company of others.
Example 1
Ted-Hey guy’s if you would like to raise your glasses, I have an after dinner speech to make.
Example 2
Wendy-We all had a lovely meal last night and then we all thought Ted was going to make a fitting after dinner speech when he stood up…But he just farted.
Ted-Hey guy’s if you would like to raise your glasses, I have an after dinner speech to make.
Example 2
Wendy-We all had a lovely meal last night and then we all thought Ted was going to make a fitting after dinner speech when he stood up…But he just farted.
by KEJIAN March 2, 2009
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