masturbating on the run

When a tardy individual is getting dressed on their way to where they're going.

Masturbating on the run is to get dressed on your way to the destination

Marge: Hurry up and get dressed we're gonna be late!
Rob: Fuck it, I'll just masturbate on the run let's just go.

I'm not one to masturbate on the run but I can't miss my grandmas funeral.

by Xtra3916 July 4, 2022

Masturbating Raven

The self-gratifying use of something that has been pillaged from another origin.
Especially a topic of conversation.

Family guy is a 'masturbating raven' of conversation - two people begin talking, one says something like:
"I hate raccoons."
The other says something like:
"Remember that Family Guy episode when..."
The other person ripostes with another episode...etc.

They didn't come up with the gags but they use, and talk of, them like they own them.
It destroys original conversation.

by Michael Berry, That Guy. December 15, 2008

friend masturbating at my house

A fucking faggot masturbating at my house

My 'friend masturbating at my house' and lets me know

by breadhasnotaste January 16, 2017

masterbating date-imitater

The guy who imagines a whole date with a girl using his hand as the girl. He'll cook diner and then just makeout with his hand too scared to make a move, c,mon you know they exist....

.....also, he may put clothes on it, even name it

Doug: "Hey Rocco, remember Norb?"

Rocco: "Ya, man, he used to try and get me to talk to Julie, ...I mean his hand, ...really freaked me out man.

Doug: "Dude I know, he was a classic case of a masterbating date-imitater."

by deliverer of babys January 16, 2011

Crying while masterbating

The depressive state where your hunger for vagina overshadows your temporary sadness. This state often results in the victim masterbating over violent porn, using his own tears as lubricant as desperate howls of anguish escape his lips.

B.A. was crying while masterbating after someone paid out his altezza tail lights the other night.

by Anal ejaculator January 12, 2012

Masterbasting

When you come back to the family's house for Thanksgiving and you leave your vibrator at home. Grab that turkey baster and go to TOWN!

Holy S**t! Masterbasting with this turkey gravy is drivin' me crazyyyy!

by Guyfromdc November 23, 2016

trick masturbating

When you think you are "trick fucking" someone else, but end up screwing yourself in the end.

First used by the American Eagle Air Line Pilots Association on June 13, 2012.

If you try to set a booby trap for someone and it back-fires on you, you just wasted your time trick masturbating.

by Captain Esquire December 17, 2012