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Computer Virus

1.) Any program on your computer that reproduces its code
2.) Any program on your computer that completely fucks it up and disables its ability to work properly
3.) A said program that you probably got when you opened an e-mail you didn't know who it was from or downloaded something that you didn't know what it was
4.) Windows
Person 1: My computer keeps crashing, I think it has a virus.
Person 2: Did you open any emails you recieved from a stranger?
1: No.
2: Did you download any strange files?
1: No.
2: Are you running Windows?
1: Yes.
by Definition DemonX October 9, 2004
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computer

The reason I can't enjoy my weekends anymore. The almighty consumer of time. This machine will eat your soul and sell the last few bits on eBay.
What? Explorer froze on my computer's process manager? I'll just end and then start the process again. (desktop crashes)
by Anonymous 3.00 BETA February 21, 2009
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competence porn

Competence porn is a plot with a type of character who is insanely good at something - usually involving some plot-twisting plans.

Coined by Reddit user Rabbithen.
Some of the main characters in shows like: Breaking Bad, Sherlock, Code Geass, Death Note, Dexter, Mad Men, Doctor House, House of Cards, White Collar, Prison Break, Limitless, Big Love, Hannibal, The Bourne Identity, Jack Reacher

provide you with competence porn.
by charlemagne March 5, 2014
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computergasm

Orgasmic behavior caused by extreme delight with some aspect of a computer.
She had a computergasm when she saw a picture of her kitty on her new 24 inch widescreen monitor.
by Crawford Best February 18, 2008
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computer hypochondria

While hypochondria is the fear of doing anything without getting a fatal injury/illness, computer hypochondria is the fear of downloading anything, no matter how verified the download is, in fear that it will screw up your computer in some way or another.
I'd download this .exe file, but I don't want to get a BSoD.

Dude, you have some bad computer hypochondria.
by Christophucked March 27, 2011
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Computer Herpes

Any program (virus, or even an anti-virus program) that you cannot get off of your computer.
I installed Norton a few years ago, but now that I'm trying to delete it, I've found I have a serious case of computer herpes.
by theboxinthecorner June 17, 2012
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Computer

Something parents dont understand, it is sexy has entertainment and shit, i fucked it because it has a usb slot...
i fucked a computer
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