Santa called me and my two other friends hoes as he said “Hoe, hoe, hoe Merry Christmas, remember, I see you when your sleeping.”
by AllFactsFromMe March 8, 2019
Get the Santamug. daughter- dad i just saw santa coming in!
dad- what! stay with me im calling the police
daughter- why dad thats santa!!
mom- santa isnt real someones breaking into our house!!!
dad- what! stay with me im calling the police
daughter- why dad thats santa!!
mom- santa isnt real someones breaking into our house!!!
by idrk8080 November 6, 2020
Get the Santamug. some fat old dude who likes to feed off poor innocent little kids' cookies and milk.
he enslaved the elves, which is y they don't live with us here today.
he is evil for making kids believe he is magical when he's really poor and only has the energy to steal food at christmas in the morning.
he enslaved the elves, which is y they don't live with us here today.
he is evil for making kids believe he is magical when he's really poor and only has the energy to steal food at christmas in the morning.
little kid wakes up to hear thumps downstairs...
leads to the living room where the cookies are....
"SANTA??!!"
sees old, fat dude in red rags and gulping down a glass of milk with oreo and cookie crumbs on scraggly old beard....
uh oh...
leads to the living room where the cookies are....
"SANTA??!!"
sees old, fat dude in red rags and gulping down a glass of milk with oreo and cookie crumbs on scraggly old beard....
uh oh...
by annie :DD December 31, 2006
Get the Santamug. (n)Story about a mythologically large and generous man with flying reindeer which ones parents tell their children in order to confuse them further into a state of catholic bliss; (n)the overweight underpaid pauper who in december wears a red suit and lets little children sit on his lap in the mall; (n)a costume fat men can wear to get chicks to sit on their lap
On Christmas Eve daddy comes home in a big red suit from the mall with five dollars for everyone and then when everyone goes to bed happy mommy always moans, "Santa!" Daddy just says, "Ho Ho Ho."
by riz December 22, 2003
Get the Santamug. pretty much hes a figure of Christmas, weither he ever did exsist or not, he is told to be a pretty fat old guy wit a white beard, rosy cheeks, "a belly that shakes like jelly when he laughs".. and dont forget his classic "ho-ho-ho".. hes pretty much just a reason for parents to buy presents for their kids.. something for kids to believe in..or something like that.
by Cecelia December 30, 2003
Get the Santamug. Santa is an old man, and wears red and white. He has a thick, white beard because he forgot to shave it. He breaks into your house, delivering presents for good boys and girls. Whilst he breaks into your house, he steals the mince pies and your dad's beer, making him obese, before creeping up to the children's room to creep on them sleeping, and fills their stockings. He must be a stalker, due to the fact, he knows wear you live, your name, and whether you have been good or not. Santa has three hoes, unlike Tiger woods.
"Santa, please may I have a pony?" "Ho. Ho. Ho. Merry Christmas ____! You have been a good little girl haven't you? Let me help myself to some of your beer, thanks."
by failingsuccess December 20, 2010
Get the Santamug. Gin-soaked pedophile
ex:
Matt was acting like such a santa the other day my 5 year old nephew started crying when he asked if he wanted to sit on his lap.
Matt was acting like such a santa the other day my 5 year old nephew started crying when he asked if he wanted to sit on his lap.
by Fucktarded Scarecrow December 30, 2009
Get the Santamug.