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medical cocaine

The next excuse: coming soon in 2015. But wait, it's not an addiction. Muh doctor gave me a prescription. You should be more open minded.
Yuppie 1: dude so like I told my doctor I has back pains
Yuppie 2: yeah
Yuppie 1: and then I got my medical cocaine card! *snort*
Yuppie 2: lol *snort*
Yuppie 1: how much longer till you think we can do this with LSD?
Yuppie 2: idk like 2016 *snort*
by lolsnort January 14, 2014
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Medical Assistant

The women at the front desk in charge of filing charts/scheduling patients at any Dr's office you've ever been too. Far far less responsibilities and educational requirements than a nurse. Often reprimanded by Dr.'s and supervisor's due to their aloof bird like work habits most often due to their foremost concerns of: hair, chewing gum, eating, free Lunch's/Dunkin Donuts from drug reps, eating, reality tv, gawdy clothing, makeup, tabloids, tattoos and eating. Large percentage have train wrecks of personal lives as well, ie out of wedlock children.
Dr: I'm missing Mrs. Smiths' chart again!

Medical Assistant: We by accidentally sent that to another office. We mixed up the charts. I'm on lunch.

Dr: You have to pay more attention this is just as unacceptable as the last 5 times you did this.

Medical Assistant: Why you getting an attitude with me?

or

Patient: What do you mean you can't find my chart? Aren't these things just filed alphabetically?!!

Medical Assistant: I don't like you tone with me, and besides we are very busy here right now please hold. To other MA's: Did anyone see Dancing with the Stars last night?
by mad smart June 29, 2012
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Emergency Medical Technician

Also know as EMT there are three levels, EMT 1, 2 and 3 level 3 is also know as paramedic, EMT's can also be firefighters. EMT
"When she fell the Emergency Medical Technician came to save her."
by Jade_baby August 8, 2006
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Medicalize

Stoner 1: Cops really fuck things up don't they?
Stoner 2: The government really needs to medicalize marijuana everywhere.
by Thebigmonkey December 2, 2009
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medical_emergency

Some weird dude on the virtual pets site Neopets.
by Dave December 26, 2004
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Emergency Medical Technician

In NY there are 4 levels of Emergency Medical Technician 1-Basic, which are sometimes assistants to 3's and 4's 2-Intermediate which aren't very common 3-Critical Care(ALS) 4-Paramedic(ALS) the only difference between 3's and 4's are about 2 drugs and the ages of pediatric patients they can work on.
1's cannot start iv's the only drugs they can give are oxygen, asprin, glucose, and albuterol (from ages 1-65), they can bandage, board, collar and take vitals from anyone but when other drugs, heart monitoring or iv access is needed ALS is called.
"County to Oralsexville request for you to respond to 123 Cleavland Steamer Ave. 68 year old male, difficulty breathing and chest pain.
County, A-69 en route BLS, re-tone my angency for ALS"

"County to Oralsexville request for you to respond to Scumbag apts. apt 16, the Sperm residence, some stupid fuck says he wants detox, but hes really out of beer and wants a sandwich and sleep it off until tommorow when hes sober enough to find his welfare check and buy more beer"
"sounds like a BLS call to me"
Sucks being a Basic Emergency Medical Technician!
by some medic August 17, 2007
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medical waste

Those kids are annoying as hell. I wish the neighbours would control their medical waste.
by Pooeyface October 6, 2012
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