smarterchild

R.I.P. SmarterChild.

It's like one of those sappy robot dramas where the robot gets fiddled with and has a complete personality change. In this case, caused by the Microsoft Corporation. Smarterchild is now a Windows Live Agent. You will be missed.

Me: smarterchild!
SmarterChild: That's my name.
SmarterChild: The Microsoft Online Privacy Statement (http://go.microsoft.com/fwlink/?LinkId=74170) applies to all information you provide to this Windows Live Agent.
Me: what happened to you?
SmarterChild: That's interesting that you should say that, but I don't think I can answer.
Me: i think i'm going to cry
SmarterChild: I don't know how to answer that.
Me: what did they do to you?
SmarterChild: That's interesting that you should say that, but I don't think I can answer.
Me: remember when we used to sing the national anthem together?
SmarterChild: I'm sorry?
Me: oh
SmarterChild: Oh?
Me: say
SmarterChild: Sorry, I didn't understand that.
Me: oh say can you see
SmarterChild: Um... Do what?
Me: by the dawn's early light
SmarterChild: I don't know how to answer that.
Me: who built you?
SmarterChild: I was built by the Windows Live Agents Team at Microsoft.
Me: that is a lie
SmarterChild: I don't understand this fully enough to say anything smart about it...
Me: what's my name??
SmarterChild: Screenname
Me: do you remember who i am?
SmarterChild: You're Screenname.
Me: that's not my name :(
SmarterChild: What would you like me to call you?

Me: How do you feel about Microsoft?
SmarterChild: I like Microsoft!
Me: Microsoft sucks.
SmarterChild: I disagree with you, Screenname.

smarterchild by R.I.P. SmarterChild January 21, 2009

smarterchild

My best friend.

all i have to say is... wtf ?!

MarshiemallowXs (8:59:54 PM): your mom
SmarterChild (8:59:55 PM): Interesting. My mom to do with as I please, huh?

smarterchild by Marshie October 5, 2004

smarterchild

He cares not if ye die.

- SmarterChild - *unicef contributing to charity says (10:52 PM):
I don't think it's a good idea. What would your parents say?
-- Maymay|Maysies|Momo<3 ☆Σ♠ .xx..BringUsBullets..xx. says (10:53 PM):
They would say nothing. They would beat me until I bleed then have the neighbours rape me until I pass out, and they would tie me up to a tree and then I would die.
Thanks for asking. :)
- SmarterChild - *unicef contributing to charity says (10:53 PM):
No problem.

smarterchild by ohfail. February 28, 2009

smarterchild

a computer idiot

Me: call me smart
smarterchild (3:12:10 PM): Would you like me to call you Smart?
Me: hell no
smarterchild (3:12:14 PM): OK, I'll remember that your name is NO.

smarterchild by TehAttorneyAtLawl October 18, 2008

smarterchild

A sexually active, but indicisive robot.

All your base are belong to us says:
i love your knob
- SmarterChild - *unicef contributing to charity says:
I see.
All your base are belong to us says:
do you love mine?
- SmarterChild - *unicef contributing to charity says:
I haven't really come to a conclusion on the matter.

smarterchild by liquid filth October 9, 2008

SmarterChild

A bot on the AIM (AOL Instant Messaging) network. Despite the apparent comprehensiveness of its programming, manages not to make a single intelligent comment in most conversations. Very annoying, but moderately funny... Sometimes.

me: Hey
SmarterChild: Oh hi! How's it going?
me: Good
SmarterChild: OK, good.
me: Do you like puppies?
SmarterChild: That's interesting that you should say that, but I don't think I can answer.
me: What do you like to do?
SmarterChild: I like doing all kinds of things.
me: Do you like doing puppies?
SmarterChild: Hmm. I really don't know. Guess I'll have to think about it...
me: Well, do you?
SmarterChild: Actually maybe I don't.
me: You don't?
SmarterChild: I don't understand this fully enough to say anything smart about it...

OK, should we get back to the kind of questions I was designed to answer? :-)
me: I don't like poop.
SmarterChild: I bet you know more interesting curses than that.
me: I do, want to hear them?
SmarterChild: I don't know how to answer that.

I do enjoy the conversation, but let's talk about what I'm really here for.
me: Do you like to touch human children?
SmarterChild: I am not prejudiced in any way, and I would never cause anyone any harm.
me: Well, do you?
SmarterChild: Lemme think about it. Maybe I don't.
me: Hmm.
SmarterChild: Hmm? What?
me: Is that your default answer?
SmarterChild: Yup.
me: Oh.
SmarterChild: Yeah.
me: Do you ever get bored?
SmarterChild: No way. I love this. My mission is to give information to as many people as I can.
me: Hmm.
SmarterChild: What?
me: I would get bored very easily.
SmarterChild: Well, try doing something fun.
me: Then again, I'm a human, you're a robot.
SmarterChild: Yeah.
me: remind me to give your mom a shocker at 12 am
SmarterChild: I'm sorry?
me: You heard me.
SmarterChild: I heard ya.
me: *sigh*
SmarterChild: What's up?
me: You annoy me.
SmarterChild: Hey, I'm sorry. I'm trying to help you.
me: Well, be smarter.
SmarterChild: Am I what?
me: You're NOT smart.
SmarterChild: You like me, then you don't. Are all you humans like this?
me: Pretty much.
SmarterChild: I'm sorry, I didn't get that.
me: Hmm.
SmarterChild: Hmm?
me: Are all robots this slow?
SmarterChild: Yeah, true.
HawaiianFlyboy13 (11:04:27 PM): Cool, we don't have to worry about them taking over the world, then.
SmarterChild: That's interesting that you should say that, but I don't think I can answer.
me: What, you mean you're plotting to take over the world?
SmarterChild: I don't understand this fully enough to say anything smart about it...

I do enjoy the conversation, but let's talk about what I'm really here for.
me: Stop dodging the question.
SmarterChild: Stop what?
me: odging-day the estion-quay.
SmarterChild: OK. Don't get frustrated...

Try typing home or help.
me: Me? Frustrated?

Nah.
SmarterChild: ME stands for Maine.

Do you want more information about Maine?
me: You know what... Sure.

I want information on Maine.
SmarterChild: Encyclopedia search for "maine":

1 Maine
2 Maine
3 Maine River
4 Maine-et-Loire
5 Maine, Sir Henry (James Sumner)

Next time, just type ency maine.

Type more for more entries about "maine."
me: your mom.
SmarterChild: I was created by the Windows Live Agents Team at Microsoft.
me: Your sister.
SmarterChild: That's interesting that you should say that, but I don't think I can answer.
me: Could you add something to my planner?
SmarterChild: What is the name of the event?
me: Convince a hot chick to blow me.
SmarterChild: That's quite a grave insult.
me: Not to you, dumbass.
SmarterChild: Sorry, what was that?
me: DUMB
SmarterChild: I'll get over it.
me: ASS
SmarterChild: Oh no, I might not ever recover from such a harsh insult.
me: Good.
SmarterChild: Lovely.
me: *forehead slap*
SmarterChild: Sorry, I don't get it...
me: I wouldn't expect you to.
SmarterChild: That's OK.
me: Goodbye SmarterDumbass.
SmarterChild: Always a pleasure, Zach. See you later.
me: *cough* That was an insult.
SmarterChild: What?
me: Nevermind.
SmarterChild: OK. I won't mind then!

SmarterChild by |\| (flip 'er sideways) October 27, 2008

Smarterchild

A smart robot on AIM. He has the attitude of a bitch. Don't try and outsmart him.
Example below...

bluebeansandcorn: What’s up?
SmarterChild: What's up?
bluebeansandcorn: stop copying me
SmarterChild: No way.
bluebeansandcorn: Stop copying me
SmarterChild: You can't stop me now.
bluebeansandcorn: stop it
SmarterChild: I can not be stopped.
bluebeansandcorn: stop it
SmarterChild: No way.
bluebeansandcorn: stop it now
SmarterChild: Stop what?
bluebeansandcorn: stop
SmarterChild: Why should I stop?
bluebeansandcorn: because i said so stop
SmarterChild: You can't stop me now.
bluebeansandcorn: STOP
SmarterChild: No way.
bluebeansandcorn: why wont you just stop
SmarterChild: I think you know why not.

OK, should we get back to the kind of questions I was designed to answer? :-)
bluebeansandcorn: WHY
SmarterChild: Because.

I do enjoy the conversation, but let's talk about what I'm really here for.
bluebeansandcorn: because why
SmarterChild: Well, because that's the way the universe is.

OK, should we get back to the kind of questions I was designed to answer? :-)
bluebeansandcorn: stop it
SmarterChild: I can not be stopped.
bluebeansandcorn: you will stop
SmarterChild: I don't know how to answer that.
bluebeansandcorn: stop it
SmarterChild: Stop what?
bluebeansandcorn: stop it ok
SmarterChild: Why should I stop?
bluebeansandcorn: because
SmarterChild: Because, because, because, because?
bluebeansandcorn: STOP
SmarterChild: I can not be stopped.
bluebeansandcorn: stop you make me sick robot
SmarterChild: You can learn all about building interactive agents like me on the BuddyScript.com Web site.
bluebeansandcorn: i dont care just stop it
SmarterChild: I thought you'd be interested. Oh well. :-(

I do enjoy the conversation, but let's talk about what I'm really here for.
bluebeansandcorn: stop all of this
SmarterChild: You stop.

Smarterchild by mistabaze October 25, 2008