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Slutstitute

A prostitute who is also a slut in her free time.
"Cash is tight during the holidays so I'll have to slutstitute. After I prostitute during the day, I'll start slutting my ass out at night so we will have someplace to eat."
by Idiocracy December 8, 2012
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Soxtitute

a female who refuses to date any other boys besides soccer boys. she like the Brazilian/Portuguese/hispanic pretty boy. they are usually on the smaller side tan skin spiked hair with a 6 or more pack. similar to a laxtitute but with soccer boys.
the soxtitute turned down the basketball player because she only hooks up with soccer players
by Original Soxtitute November 14, 2010
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surostitutes

hey do you know where i can find any surostitutes?

you dirty surostitutes?

how much for your surostitutes?

look joey is banging a surostitutes!
by Holden H. September 5, 2006
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Stiff Drink Substitute

A satisfying substitute used by the consumption of a non-alcoholic beverage or food item in place of an alcoholic drink after a long, rough day.
The kids were a real handful today, so this ice cream is my stiff drink substitute.

My boyfriend and I got into a fight and he bought me chocolate as an apology gift. Now I'm eating my stiff drink substitute.
by Sole Obsession February 19, 2010
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snowstitute

a curious product of Chicago's Blizzard of 2011, "snowstitution" is a practice where a guy (with a car surrounded/covered by snow) hires an attractive girl to make feeble, ineffective attempts at shoveling the snow, only to lure in random guys (snow-shovelling johns, or "shons") to take over for the snow-shovelling damsel-in-distress. Also known as a "snowjob."
My car was all but lost in the snow, until I picked up a snowstitute to get the job done. The shons couldn't keep teir hands off their shovels.
by rsb1000 February 23, 2011
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Substitute Creature

An old substitute teacher that totally creeps you out.

EXAMPLE DESCRIPTION:
You a student watch her as she puts her glasses on, and they've got a chain, and her voice is raspy and old. She hands back tests and her hand shakes uncontrollably, and you hide in the bathroom all of class to avoid her evil glare.
McKenna: What do we need for science today?
Alexa: I would be afraid.
McKenna: Why?
Alexa: We've got a substitute creature today.
McKenna: No!
Alexa: Stay calm, the bathroom should be empty.
McKenna: Don't tell me she's got an evil glare.
Alexa: Yup.
McKenna: Hope I survive...
Alexa: Hahaha yah
by High_Flying_Hawk.101 November 11, 2011
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spastitute

A spastic who's general lack of self esteem and rock bottom economic /social standing has ultimately led them into proistitution and or drug addiction. Having arisen as a direct result of the global econoimic recession spastitutes now have a niche market in the world of prostitution often with client bases consisting of the rich, famous and powerful. It is rumoured that 3 spastitutes actually have a hidden bum dungeon 30 feet below the house of commons.
Hello their tarquin, im off to play polo would you care to join me?

Why thank you sebastian, but i must politely decline as im parked on double yellows and there's an angry spastitute in my boot gagging on a cuntflannel.
by necromancer March 6, 2012
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