Everyone thinks they're as funny as a comedian, even if they really aren't. Often comes after someone makes a joke that was only funny to them, timed too late, or overly snarky.
Dave: "Man, it's really hot out today."
Jack: "Tell me something I don't know, Captain Obvious. Maybe it's because the giant ball of fire in the sky is out?"
Dave: "Alright, everyone's a comedian."
Jack: "Tell me something I don't know, Captain Obvious. Maybe it's because the giant ball of fire in the sky is out?"
Dave: "Alright, everyone's a comedian."
by nycdoggo May 23, 2025
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Get the Evelyn Toribio Is Vergil, Skye Toribio Is Sparda, Heather Toribio Is Dante mug.A big fat stinky loser twink femboy who is whitewashed and loves little white boys and sucking femboys and furry butt plugs
by Hinigger June 5, 2025
Get the Evelyn the femboy mug.evelyn is a smart sexy loving girl who works at jersey mikes. anyone who has had an evelyn in their life would be the luckiest man alive. her ass is fat and outs smiles on peoples faces when she walks in the room.
by phatpusspuss June 28, 2025
Get the evelyn mug.A social theory describing the phenomenon where adults in American society display the emotional maturity, decision-making skills, and behavioral patterns of twelve-year-olds.
Origin: Coined by Patrick Cosmos (@veryimportant.lawyer on Bluesky) as a "unified theory of American reality" that went viral on social media in 2025.
Origin: Coined by Patrick Cosmos (@veryimportant.lawyer on Bluesky) as a "unified theory of American reality" that went viral on social media in 2025.
Example 1: "Did you see how that guy threw a tantrum when his coffee order was wrong? Everyone is twelve now."
Example 2: "'Everyone is twelve now', she complained, when in response to HuffPost’s query about who suggested Budapest, White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt responded, 'Your mom did', and White House communications director Steven Cheung replied: 'Your mom'."
Example 2: "'Everyone is twelve now', she complained, when in response to HuffPost’s query about who suggested Budapest, White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt responded, 'Your mom did', and White House communications director Steven Cheung replied: 'Your mom'."
by patchmonkey October 17, 2025
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Get the Everlasting semen stopper mug.Evelyn is such a fitting name for her; she has that calm, soothing vibe that makes you feel like she was born in the peaceful evening hours.
by Emotional Cruiser November 8, 2025
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