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Lansing Suprise

When you go to Art Van Furnature and buy a love seat on clearance. That night, you decided to have Indian Food. You think to yourself, "damn... my shit will be runny and hot tonite.#windyshit" Suddenly realizing that perhaps today wasn't the best day to both replace your toilet and get Indian food, you desperately search for a place to shit.

The smell of a brand new, cheaply produced Art Van couch pulled you right in... you took of a coushion and hover over the painful springs

"Ow!" You say "spicy, spicy,spicy," you shout. "Fuck my ass, fuck my ass, the Indians have fucked my ass!" The runny diarrhea comes out of your asshole Ronnie and spicy runny and spicy spicy and runny and seeps into the cracks of the brand new couch. At first, you smell shit, but then, the 24 hour artificial couch with preservative Kickin and it starts to smell like citrus.

The next day, the preservative was wearing off. You went back to Art Van to return the couch but they won't let you because you got it on clearance so you shit on it again and drive through the display window with your 1998 Chevy Silverado and dump the shity couch on a fucked up matress.
"Oh fuck"

"What is it Manager Dave?"

"We've got another Lansing Suprise."

"Oh shit"
by AsherBigCock June 18, 2018
mugGet the Lansing Suprisemug.

Sticky suprise

When you're taking a poop, but when you go to wipe you clench your butt hole and the toilet paper rips and sticks to your butt.
I'm so unlucky, I just got a sticky suprise while shitting.
by LukeDaFluke March 1, 2017
mugGet the Sticky suprisemug.

Slurpity Suprise

Sexual act of receiving a blow job/ or hand job and right as your about to cum, your partner catches your cum in their hand and bitch slaps you right across your face as a surprise ending!
I gave my boyfriend a Slurpity Suprise last night and he loved it!!
by Kozmikella June 26, 2022
mugGet the Slurpity Suprisemug.

Suprise Breakfast

When u wake ur whore up with a cumshot in the mouth. This definition only applies if she bitch swallows AND if does not fall back asleep.
When that bitch finally turns 12, ima be there in here house with a suprise breakfast.
by CrackWhoreLaranda January 9, 2017
mugGet the Suprise Breakfastmug.

suprise buttsex

when guy/girl comes behind and surprisingly anal you without notice
SUPRISE BUTTSEX: god damn i just surprised my wife with surprise BUTT SEX.
by TR!sT1bo11 m00 November 11, 2019
mugGet the suprise buttsexmug.

Scottish Suprise

When a male of the human species puts whipped cream on the tip of his genitalia and then inserts the penal shaft into the mouth of a sleeping victim. This is to be done gently so the victim does not wake, and the purpose of the whipped cream is to cover up the taste of semen.
Aww man. I woke up with a white creamy substance in my mouth, it kinda tastes like whipped cream, I think I was given a Scottish Suprise! Fuck
by biznatch8==D August 16, 2008
mugGet the Scottish Suprisemug.

biohazard suprise

1. Sprinkling asbestos onto the drip end of your dick and get a blowjob

2. Rigging someone's corn flakes with zyklon b and have them eat it.

3. Put an unborn fetus under the covers of someone's bed.

4. what you get when you get a flu shot from an already used needle

5. The very moment you discover you have AIDS.
Stay away from Waldo. He has a biohazard suprise waiting for you
by nicest terrorist January 10, 2010
mugGet the biohazard suprisemug.

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