by Biggius Dickus January 20, 2020
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The only known person with immunity to diabetes and obesity-related death. He’s normally found in malls around Christmas time scaring the living crap out of children.
Timmy: How does Santa Claus get around so quickly with all those cookies in his tummy?
Mom: You’d be fast too if the police kept trying to track you down for breaking and entering.
Mom: You’d be fast too if the police kept trying to track you down for breaking and entering.
by Inferior April 22, 2020
Get the Santa Claus mug.oh,he must be a santan because of his personality
by eminem May 6, 2020
Get the santan mug.The man born of a satanic ritual to haunt adults and please children. First off to start the madness of this "creature", he is insanely fat and doesn't have diabetes. Second, he gets stuck in chimney's bigger than him. Last, he sneaks into your house, knows when you sleeping and awake, so he basically knows everything about every human in the history of the world.
Santa: *gets summoned out of pentagram* time to "investigate the humans
Little child: I PROMISE TO BE GOOD THIS YEAR SO I CAN GET A SINGULAR HOTWEEL
Parents: he wishes Santa was real.
Santa: *breaks window and lands on floor*
Obnoxiously Loud Child: YOUR REAL???? GIVE ME EVERYTHING ON THIS LIST, NOW!!!!!!!!!!
Santa: I am going home now. *gives child a string and some shotgun shells*
Child: BEST. GIFT. EVER!!!
Little child: I PROMISE TO BE GOOD THIS YEAR SO I CAN GET A SINGULAR HOTWEEL
Parents: he wishes Santa was real.
Santa: *breaks window and lands on floor*
Obnoxiously Loud Child: YOUR REAL???? GIVE ME EVERYTHING ON THIS LIST, NOW!!!!!!!!!!
Santa: I am going home now. *gives child a string and some shotgun shells*
Child: BEST. GIFT. EVER!!!
by Sir.Person July 18, 2020
Get the Santa mug.Santa is a stalker that eats children once a year. He only watches when you’re unconscious, and uses the facade of presents to keep doing what he’s doing. His whole lineage does this, the real Santa was shot a long time ago by someone on the right side of history
by jesuis christ August 6, 2020
Get the Santa mug.The obese Unholy being that can manage to go down the tiniest chimney in existence. He is literally god, he can see you everywhere, and he'll check your behavior like a babysitter.
Child: I LOVE SANTA
Dream Crusher: He sneaks into your house, steals your stuff, feels bad and gives you some of the things he doesn't use, then he leaves reality until December 25th.
Child: My mother shall hear about this
Child: I LOVE SANTA
Dream Crusher: He sneaks into your house, steals your stuff, feels bad and gives you some of the things he doesn't use, then he leaves reality until December 25th.
Child: My mother shall hear about this
Child: I LOVE SANTA
Dream Crusher: He sneaks into your house, steals your stuff, feels bad and gives you some of the things he doesn't use, then he leaves reality until December 25th.
Child: My mother shall hear about this
Dream Crusher: He sneaks into your house, steals your stuff, feels bad and gives you some of the things he doesn't use, then he leaves reality until December 25th.
Child: My mother shall hear about this
by Sir.Person August 31, 2020
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