virtual morning wood

the erection caused by taking a nap instead of a whole night's sleep. Instead of true morning wood, it is a phallic fallacy.

Mah: "Man, after this nice long nap, I think I'm going to have to go out back and chop this virtual morning wood."

by SuterLareau February 23, 2011

monday morning quarterback

Used to describe monday morning's on the toilet when your poop is only quarter-way out of your butt and doesn't want to come out just yet...thus making it a long process to finish

"why were you late for work today?"
"i had a monday morning quarterback"
"oh i see, carry on"

by mmqer January 17, 2019

Christmas Morning

That special time in a young man's life when its 7 o'clock in the morning on December 25th, and out of excitement he runs down the stairs at full speed, not expecting a sudden pain as his newly fallen balls flap against his thigh. This right of passage makes you think twice about running down the stairs next year.

Guys, i'm only 10 but this year was my Christmas Morning!

by DiabloRain November 8, 2010

Good Morning America

At an all male sleepover, whoever falls asleep first gets jerked off and then smacked in the face with the offending splooge covered hand... slapper must shout, "Good Morning America!" upon delivery of slap.

Bobby called his mom crying to pick him up from the sleepover after Johnny gave him the Good Morning America.

by JYeezie March 30, 2010

irish morning

when you wake in the morning to a man-ish woman and the aftermath of several drunken choices breathing in your face.

"hey man... i think i killed someone the other night and i havent been able to get rid of this itch since then."

"shit sounds like one hell of an Irish morning you had."

by the seven wharfs March 17, 2014

Morninggoggle

A slur used towards any type of race

You damn Morninggoggle

by DiscountNavy April 8, 2021

Morning Gorge

the quite opposit to Morning Wood;

Tony: i cant get out of bed yet as i have mahooosive morning wood.

Ami: i can not get up either as ones vag is wider than normal.

Tony: a ha i see the problem...morning gorge.

by N.A.A.R.C.F.R.D February 6, 2010