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humpty ass

My humpty ass forgot to save my paper and I lost it when my computer crashed.
by Taco Tea Co. May 19, 2006
mugGet the humpty assmug.

Humpty Dumpty

One partner puts an egg (uncooked, in the shell) up their butt and the couple goes on a date. If the egg breaks, the partner with the egg gives head to the other and if it doesn’t, the other partner retrieves the egg and makes breakfast (after giving head).
Hey babe, should we Humpty Dumpty tonight at the pub? Our friends will never know. Hehehhe
by corub69 January 7, 2024
mugGet the Humpty Dumptymug.

Humpty-Dumptied

This wonderful event starts out with a man sitting on a wall to show off his crotch to a woman he has a crush on. To show the woman that he is mating material, he will hump the wall in hopes of moistening her lady garden. However, he does not realize that humping the hard wall will stimulate his spinky and cause a great fall... of shit. The poopy will land below on the woman, and all hopes of mating will be crushed.
Tyrant: Yo boss, happy Friday. Any fun plans for the weekend?

The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.

Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.

The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.

Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
by Stoney69 December 18, 2020
mugGet the Humpty-Dumptiedmug.

kade humpty-dump truck

Someone named Kade who has a voluptuous lower end.
Kade- Hey dude.
Nick- Wow you have a big bottom, may I call you Kade Humpty-Dump Truck
by CrystalClearSight June 16, 2021
mugGet the kade humpty-dump truckmug.

HUMPTY DUMPTY

When you hump a girl presumably your date, then proceed to shit all over the bed, and make her clean it up.
Jack "Bro Natalie is a freak bro she wanted me to humpty dumpy her"
Steve"So did you??"
Jack "Hell yea bro"

A humpty dumpty is when you have sex with a girl then proceed to shit all over the bed.
by Reese98 May 3, 2021
mugGet the HUMPTY DUMPTYmug.

Humpty-Dumpty

When you dry hump someone and then take a dump on their face
John : "Ah yes, Susan loves the Humpty-Dumpty"
by Philosophical Panda October 13, 2021
mugGet the Humpty-Dumptymug.

Humpty

The fuel of nightmares, typically an egg or a previous English king.
by poroekd October 13, 2022
mugGet the Humptymug.

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