A
college credit class taken by
high school students during the latter years (junior or senior, usually). The class reviews a
set number of pre-defined topics by the College Board. The test is formulated by a very devious and malevolent group of individuals who masquerade under the common name Educational Testing Service, or ETS. The sole purpose of this group is to devise a monstrous 3-hour examination composed of two sections, each worth 50% of the test-taker's grade.
Section I - 90 minutes
75 Multiple Choice Questions
Section II -
95 minutes
Part A -
55 minutes
- 3 problems
Part B - 40 minutes
- 2
essay questions
- 1 chemical reactions question
Each free response question will normally be composed of 5-7 subquestions in the form of 1)a, 1)b, 1)c, 1)d, 1)e... Each subquestion will be worded in a cruelly confusing manner and require the test taker to scramble frantically through his/her sheet of common chemical equations before, upon realizing that the equation is either not listed or discovering that he/she doesn't know how to use the equation, bursting into inconsolable tears. Studies show that that this is a common reaction. Stay
calm,
smile at the proctor, pick up your
pencil, and write THIS IS SPARTA across the available space.