Greasy bagel

Sexual move for a girl with a shallow vagina. Take a bagel with butter, microwave it. Then put it on your dick. Now your huge dick won't impale her tiny vagina.

My girls pussy is so shallow, I had to use the greasy bagel.

by Kernel mustard April 11, 2013

Infinite Bagel Theory

The theory that if a bagel is cut horizontally, each half can be considered one bagel, allowing an infinite number of bagels to be formed from one bagel. This is to say, as long as a section of an object is identified as a whole, the entirety of its children on the same plane can also be considered whole, creating a paradox where an original object can be responsible for the creation of an infinite number of itself.

Craig: "I bought this bagel from a New York bakery and they consider half a bagel a whole bagel?"
Graham: "Yeah it supports the Infinite Bagel Theory. As long as the horizontal slice is considered whole, an endless number of bagels can be formed."

by bobfrog93 May 18, 2021

The Concealed Bagel

A douche bag of a A boy, who idealizes women and needs to dig a hole! He says he loves you then he gets together with some skanky ass ho. All he wants is sex and can never get why you want him so badly. Stay away from this type of boy. Aslo known as the Abdo.

Eh. Ma. Gawd. The Concealed Bagel said he loved me then left me! Can you believe?!

by StrawberryJelly August 16, 2009

Douche Bagery

The act of doing something that would lead others to believe you are in fact a douche bag.

John: (watching Bush on TV) This guy is such a douche bag.
Alex: I think all governments take part in douche bagery on one level or another.

by emptsent January 13, 2008

douche bagel

Like douche bag, but way better because of the extra "el," and also has the ability to accept condiments such as creme cheese.

You're such a douche bagel you should sell yourself at panera bread.

by S. Beebe August 4, 2007

whiskey bagel

The inability for a women's vagina to become moist enough to allow easy penetration. The female version of whiskey dick.

After a long night of drinking at the bar, she had the worst case of whiskey bagel.

by steven-jones February 25, 2009

Pizza Bagel

A bleeding blue waffle which has pus leaking from over sized boils which smells like garlic.

Have you met the blue waffles ugly cousin Pizza bagel?

by SHENZILLA December 8, 2010