I'm such a nice person

A quote to be said, whenever you perform a total dick move, or when retelling a total dick move.

Yeah I totally anaconda-choked Paul while he was drunk,

and then I left him unconscious on the beach for, like, an hour.
Dude was bitching and moaning from sunburn the next day,
so I choked him out again.
I'm such a nice person.

by Chewbacca Da Wookie July 6, 2011

schadenfreude

German for "happiness at the misfortune of others"

Clapping when a waitress falls and drops a tray of glasses

Watching figure skaters falling on their asses

Watching people out in the rain

Watching a vegetarian being told she just ate chicken

Watching a frat boy realize just what he put his dick in

Being on an elevator when somebody shouts "Hold the door!"

Straight A students getting Bs

Exes getting STDs

Waking doormen from their naps

Watching tourists reading maps

Football players getting tackled

CEOs getting shackled

Watching actors never reach the ending of their Oscar speech

Schadenfreude: Making me feel glad that I'm not you.

by Janet Weiss August 26, 2005

you're such a piece

A phrase first coined by Ehsan Alavi, the insult "you're such a piece" is usually used against immature children such as Milad Madanipour and Kayvan Alavi.

see also: Eat a D

lol, i just deleted your hard drive

duude, you're such a piece.

by House of D August 23, 2006

schadenfreude

The feeling of pleasure gathered from watching the suffering of another human being.

Remember the enormous pleasure you got watching dad get kicked in the nuts on AFHV in the 80s, or ogling any fat asshole in the world dancing in bikini briefs or redneck on a crotch rocket who smashes his face in on the old log next to the "swimmin' hole" near his dilapidated shack on YouTube? That's schadenfreude... It's what makes you human... Or a very bad person.

by Vice Morris July 29, 2009

YOURE SUCH A SUSSY BAKA OH MY GOD SUCH SUSSY BAKA

SUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSYYYYYYYYYY BAAAAAAAKAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Josh: "YOURE SUCH A SUSSY BAKA UWU"
Not Josh: "What the fuck Josh?"
Josh: "YOURE SUCH A SUSSY BAKA OH MY GOD SUCH SUSSY BAKA"

by sussy baka nya July 19, 2021

schadenfreugasm

(n.) to have so much joy at another person's misfortune you can barely contain yourself

Dude, yesterday that One-up James we know got shot down by this total hottie... Who put him down by calling him a One-up James! I had the biggest schadenfreugasm you've ever seen.

by 7thAge October 24, 2011

schadenfridge

the pleasure derived from the unfortunate contents of another's refrigerator.

Jim's refrigerator contained nothing but fat free ranch dressing and expired milk. His dinner guests had a brief sense of schadenfridge at the expense of their otherwise well-prepared friend.

by captainsandwich January 2, 2012