Premature Handshakulation

The act of going for a handshake, and closing your hand prematurely, gripping your partner's hand anywhere from the knuckles to the finger tips, instead of the intended palm of his or her hand.

"Wow. Colton has a bad case of Premature Handshakulation.."

by MassiveBeardsFTW November 26, 2011

Pervature

the degree to which someones perverted-ness is uncomfortably awkward

My friend began "hitting" on a girl and his pervature only got steeper.

by Wheres-The-Fun-in-That December 10, 2014

premature eclapulation

The embarrassing occurrence of a person who is unable to stop themselves from applauding a performance a bit to early or even much too early during a performance. It may occur during a play, concert, speech, opera or sometimes even a movie. The most humorous situation would be a single loud clap followed by the offenders attempt to turn their red face to search the crowd as eyes fall in their direction to see who dunnit. It is however still received as a great complement to the performers .

I almost died laughing the other night when Sophia started to applaud during that pause in Beethoven's 9th symphony when the tenor ends with that dismal note and we all know the flutes are about to kick in. It was a perfect single smack premature eclapulation.

by Santiago Suicide King April 3, 2015

Premature Squeeze

The action involuntary squeezing too early when taking a shit. Generally results in a messy cleanup.

I had a clean and easy poop passing, then I accidentally had a premature squeeze resulting in a messy cleanup and using far too much toilet paper.

by NB44 October 4, 2017

premature geyser

When you are on your bed beating your cock so hard that your cum unexpectedly flies up into your face and mouth.

Ryan: Dude I experienced a premature geyser last night.

Me: Sorry to hear that man.

by nico jack pepper November 15, 2017

Premature ejaculatory discombobulation following Newton's 1st Law

The sperm that is ejaculated from rest at a constant velocity unless acted upon by an unbalanced force or object.

I unfortunately developed : Premature ejaculatory discombobulation following Newton's 1st Law

by Curry The Wise March 11, 2021

premature celebration

Throwing a party or celebrating an event before it is appropriate. Most often done in an effort to fit the schedule of someone other than the party honoree.

Kelly: Why are we having cake today? Isn't Cara's birthday next Friday?

Mark: Yeah, but her boss is on vacation next week, so we're having a premature celebration.

by Fireball D May 7, 2009