Keyboard Empowerment

A sense of worth and authority that can only be gained by sitting behind a keyboard for countless hours blogging or commenting on forum threads. Typically reserved for individuals who feel as if they are well versed in the political or religious fields but in reality are more ignorant than the average human. Also accompanied by a general worthlessness in their real life. This is most commonly seen in younger individuals who have poor social skills and are void of any athletic or scholastic talent.

Guy 1: "Fuck all you noobs out there! When slavery finally comes back I hope you all get put into it! Haxorz 4 lyfe!!

Guy 2: "Wow, this is ridiculous. You're sense of keyboard empowerment has gotten out of hand"

by John Coktoastin October 13, 2009

Keyboard warrior

A bunch of worthless idiots who think they are safe behind that screen but when you confront them they act different and beg you not to cut their throat.

Keyboard warrior

by Punjabi power September 2, 2020

keyboard

1.the only thing, besides your penis, that's in your hands right now.
2. apparently it is a weapon (see the movie WANTED)

oh bro could you hold my keyboard for me? no, not that the other thing.

by ZBreezy June 28, 2009

Keyboard Klansman

n: The loser, with a surplus of time on his hands, that clicks on YouTube links just so he can leave a racist rant in the comments section.

This individual is usually hard to identify/locate, since he chooses to express his bad-ass, pseudo-nazi rhetoric from the safety of his super-secret Racist Loser Batcave.

The rants of these losers are easily identified by misspelled words, lack of punctuation, and overusage of profanity.

ex 1: In the news today: Jimbo Johnson, aka niggerhayter1981, was severely beaten after several members of the G.W. Bush High School basketball team uncovered the true identity of the elusive keyboard klansman.
He will be missed.

ex 2: "Dang-Gone!! another McDonald's application denied! ...and it's all cuzza them dang Mexicans!! Looks like a job for the Keyboard Klansman... I'll show 'em!"

by Harry Hogdick February 15, 2009

Keyboard Smegma

The food particules, skin flakes, and dust that accumulates in the crevices between your keys on your keyboard and rots. Later, you can collect your keyboard smegma and use for sprinklings on cupcakes that will be given to your worst enemy.

Jim: I hate Rob so much. I need to repay him for the misdeeds he's done.

Larry: Hey, I got an idea?

Jim: What?

Larry: Let's bake up some cupcakes, top them off with keyboard smegma, and give 'em to him. He'll enjoy the rich, dense texture of the cake and crunch away on the bits of smegma. Stupid bastard!

Jim: Good idea Larry! That'll teach that SOB.

by McPhatty May 18, 2006

keyboard warrior

some insecure, sad souls who spread bullshit on internet about people on forums like this one

Anonymous no.1: "hey, have you seen those messages describing that guy on here?"

Anonymous no.2: "yeah, must be keyboard warriors, fuck the lot of them hey?"

by youdon'tknowme! July 21, 2010

keyboard tourette's

When you randomly type an obscene word or phrase for no apparent reason other than you felt like it or wanted to see what it looked like.

Professor: John, why does your term paper have the words "Horse Fucker" in the middle of it?

John: Sorry. I had keyboard Tourette's last night and I forgot to erase it

by Shane21332 December 7, 2007