3 definitions by McPhatty
When a male sits on his hand long enough to lose the sensation of feeling and then masturbates. Gives the effect of receiving a hand job from another.
Hey Joe, it's hard to believe that Sarah declined my date tonight. I guess it's another night with the friendly stranger.
by McPhatty April 14, 2006
The food particules, skin flakes, and dust that accumulates in the crevices between your keys on your keyboard and rots. Later, you can collect your keyboard smegma and use for sprinklings on cupcakes that will be given to your worst enemy.
Jim: I hate Rob so much. I need to repay him for the misdeeds he's done.
Larry: Hey, I got an idea?
Jim: What?
Larry: Let's bake up some cupcakes, top them off with keyboard smegma, and give 'em to him. He'll enjoy the rich, dense texture of the cake and crunch away on the bits of smegma. Stupid bastard!
Jim: Good idea Larry! That'll teach that SOB.
Larry: Hey, I got an idea?
Jim: What?
Larry: Let's bake up some cupcakes, top them off with keyboard smegma, and give 'em to him. He'll enjoy the rich, dense texture of the cake and crunch away on the bits of smegma. Stupid bastard!
Jim: Good idea Larry! That'll teach that SOB.
by McPhatty May 10, 2006
> I love being a buttfarmer because I appreciate a nice, tight female ass so much!
> A buttfarmer's work is never done, but the reward of having cultivated asses that you can bounce a dime off of is worth it.
> A buttfarmer's work is never done, but the reward of having cultivated asses that you can bounce a dime off of is worth it.
by McPhatty April 7, 2006