turtle surprise

When during a rim job, the rimee squeezes some amount of turd out, either voluntarily or involuntarily, and poop ends up on or in the rimmer's mouth.

"I wasn't feeling well, but he insisted on rimming me. I ended up giving him a turtle surprise."

by grubblerfubbler February 5, 2014

turtle farmer

The individual responsible for extracting the boofed object; a correctional officer

Upon arriving to the correctional facility for a conjugal visit , I was subjected to a cavity search by a turtle farmer.

by Kattpisseverdeen March 5, 2015

Turtle Pack

When one has very large testicles and or penis, they will have a large bulge in their trousers that can be easily noticed.

That guy walking past the chippy has got a huge turtle pack!!

by BoatMan May 28, 2015

turtle herder

Someone that is in charge of rounding up, containing, or otherwise directing slow moving people, especially children.

Getting anywhere on time with little kids makes me feel like a turtle herder

by herdingturtles June 8, 2015

turtle panda

an amazing creature with a turtle shell and panda body how mystical

wow! look at that turtle panda sleep!!

by lilshyali January 7, 2016

Turtle smoke

The act of beating someone who is so slow even though you are incredibly slow yourself. Or is a procrastinator accomplishes a task before another procrastinator.

JPow was the worst procrastinator in the history of the world, but, he still managed to turtle smoke Lei-hi by completing his task of shucking his pile of corn stalks before her. ...thus, Leigha has been turtle smoked...

by LalaGG June 23, 2016

turtle sticking it's head out

The feeling you have when it's time to take a shit and the turd is starting to poke out. Most annoying when you are far away from a bathroom.

"I've got to find a bathroom fast...I got a turtle sticking it's head out!!!

by Uncle Lee May 22, 2016