carpenter's special

flat chested floosy.

Flat as a board and easy to screw.

Trey: "After I finished demonstrating my new "table saw", she removed her top. 'til then, I didn't realize I was in for a carpenter's special."

Abdul: "Go figga!"

by Ridoinkulous March 14, 2009

Carpet-Punching

(V) Similar to racking a guy in the nuts, but performed on a female.

I was going down on her and she queefed in my face, so I punched started carpet-punching her.

by TomCat7770 February 10, 2010

Carpet Cruiser

A lesbian that repeatedly performs oral sex on other women, as if driven to. An excessive 'carpet muncher.'

Megan: Wow, that Stacy's a real Carpet Cruiser.

Emily: Yeah I know, she was over last night.

Megan: She was at your place, too? Wow.

by Ben Fletcher March 25, 2010

carpe weiner

Similar to the Latin 'carpe diem' and the German 'weiner' (prounced vee-ner).

The overwhelming desire to grab some male genitalia.

I need it so bad, I am going to carpe weiner even if the attached life support system is a total tool.

by das punisher April 4, 2011

Carpet Brother

is the term for a straight guy that hangs out with lesbians

Hey did you hear Blake is hanging out with Steph?
Yeah, total carpet brother.

by alekeit July 24, 2011

Carpet Tree

Where carpets come from. The colour and design of the carpet depends on where the carpet tree is growing.

This black carpet came from an African carpet tree.

by metoo1115 October 28, 2011

carpetfeet

A racial slur for mexicans who try to cross the border by putting pieces of carpet on their feet so that border patrol cannot track their footprints. (otherwise known as illegal spics trying to pollute our country)

Dude those carpetfeet just bypassed border patrol!

That was a huge piece of garbage... nope it was just some carpetfeet running across the road.

by dirtymojo August 4, 2012