Turtle Suit

Also known as an anti-suicide smock, Ferguson, pickle suit, or Bam Bam suit.

A lovely one-piece clothing item jails/prisons give to those seen as a suicide risk. (jokes also count unfortunately)

Jeff: "Man, I got in a fight with Lucy and got arrested last night. They put me in a Turtle Suit."

Dale: "Well that's probably because you were eating a squirrel by the time they found you."

Turtle Suit by jew_bastard January 20, 2026

Turtle Gooning

The act of masturbating within a confined public space, i.e., a T-shirt or turtle neck. This is a very hidden and risky form of Gooning that only a master of baiting would know.

Defined conversation: "Hey man, how did your last goon sesh go?"

"It was exhilarating. I was in public, so I had to Turtle Goon on the bus."

"What's turtle gooning?" "It's when you jerk off into your shirt with your head also recessed into the shirt."

Turtle Gooning by GUNTHATHEGOONAH. April 5, 2026

Turtle Gooning

The act of masturbating within a confined public space, i.e., a T-shirt or turtle neck. This is a very hidden and risky form of Gooning that only a master of baiting would know.

Defined conversation: "Hey man, how did your last goon sesh go?"

"It was exhilarating. I was in public, so I had to Turtle Goon on the bus."

"What's turtle gooning?" "It's when you jerk off into your shirt with your head also recessed into the shirt."

Turtle Gooning by GUNTHATHEGOONAH. April 5, 2026

Turtle Flirting

When you, or someone else, has to poop so bad that it’s starting to poke out and you must force it back in. This activates an uncomfortable dance while you try to get to a toilet before it’s too late.

My corgi won’t go potty until she finds the perfect spot. She’s been turtle-flirting for five minutes.

Wait, don’t start the dungeon! I gotta shit, I’ve been turtle flirting that whole time.

Turtle Flirting by Notfasava April 6, 2026

turtle box

A virgin pussy

I tried to smash that hoe but she got a turtle box

turtle box by d drape June 2, 2026

Box turtle 

When your penis retracts back into your body, like a turtles head back into its shell.

when I answered the door , and saw how ugly my blind date was, I immediately went box turtle.

Box turtle by Yurdle September 22, 2016

The Turtle Club 

This was an informal bar drinking club active from the sixties to the eighties. To join all one need do was ask "are you a turtle " or answer "you bet your sweet ass I'm a turtle "

Jim saw another lone drinker at the airport VIP bar and came over to ask about the turtle club, thus being a convivial drinker.

The Turtle Club by I, Wreckerrr November 4, 2016