pee in my toilet

Also known as "pee in the toilet." When something is so funny and a gorgeous redhead is making really awkward conversation with a yetti and you just can't help to pee in your pants...except you're on the toilet. so. yeah.

You can't just pee your pants, you gotta pee your toilet too!

Amy: "So Jeanette, what'd you get on the math test"
Jeanette: "A 'C-'"
Amy: "Ohhh..."
Jen: HAHAHAHAH *piss* HAHAHAHAHA *pee* HAHAHHAAHA *urinate* HAHAHHAHAHAA.

Later...

Amy: "Well that was awkward..."
Jen: "I know! I was peeing in my pants it was so funny"
Amy: "Except you were on the toilet...So I guess you were peeing in your toilet"
Jen: "Yeah so funny that it made me pee in my toilet!"

by Jenetty the Yetty June 3, 2007

Toilet Man

A person dressed up as a toilet in the annual 4th of July parade. Featured since never.

My favorite float in the parade was the on with the Toilet Man.

by anonymous September 29, 2003

Toilet Beef

A (usually) non-ingestible artefact found in lavatories. Named for its similar appearance to beef, although its odour and edible qualities are notably less pleasant. Its origin is unknown, but it is generally agreed within the scientific community that it is from a biological source.

I just made some toilet beef, dude! Wanna see?

by Mr. Stab December 4, 2007

toilet bombed

when you go to the toilet only to discover someone, or perhaps yourself from earlier, has left a rotting pile of shit and/or a bowl full of piss that has been sitting in the toilet unflushed.

It is especially bad if you have to lift the lid of the toilet first, then the smell of the old shit and piss explodes in your face. Much like a bomb.

::lifts toilet lid::
Holy fuck look at that turd! It smells like someone just took a shit in my left nostril. I can't believe I just got fucking toilet bombed.

by ThatsWhatVBSaid December 4, 2009

toilet face

When a chick is so nasty looking her face looks like a good place to take a shit and make an improvement

It was almost bar close so I picked up a toilet face to bring home for a slump buster

by dickfitswelljr October 29, 2010

Toiletsex Marathon

When two friends are running to every toilet in a shopping center to have sex. Usual amount is at least 5.

Theres five toilet booths here, want a Toiletsex Marathon?

by pineapplemoonshinetheoriginal November 14, 2010

toilet texting

Text messaging with one hand, wiping your ass with the other.

Kyle's phone broke because he accidentally wiped his ass with the same hand he was still toilet texting with. (PSA: Don't text while shitting!)

by Benutty March 6, 2008