Suicide Blumpkin

The act of sucking your own dick while shitting until a turd flies out the bowl into your eye penetrating your brain, killing you

Poor Larry couldn’t take it anymore and performed a suicide blumpkin on himself

by John Crump March 31, 2025

Self-Blumpkin Technique

The self-bumpkin technique is performed by first waiting 7-10 days without taking a shit, and then when finally shitting, curving the large feces toward you, under your balls, up from between your legs, and into your dick. You then suck the shit back in and out of your ass, repeating this movement until ejaculation. This technique results in euphoria, as well as chlamydia, herpes, HPV, gonorrhea, and syphilis. Also you may notice black discharge from the urethra 2-12 hours after performing this technique.

It is told that performing this technique 7 times can result in ascension to a higher plane of spiritual existence, however no one has survived the process more than 3 times.

“Dude, I’m about to try the self-blumpkin technique! I’m 6 days in without shitting!”

“Bro I wouldn’t do that. I tried it 4 years ago and there’s still black shit in my dick.”

by Rusted Sounding Rod April 29, 2025

Busy Blumpkin

Pissing and shitting while receiving a blumpkin.

“Yo, last night this bitch gave me a busy blumpkin.”

by fallout4luvr May 18, 2025

Mongolian blumpkin fister

When the giver puts their arms, legs, and head, up the receiver’s rectum and begins to rotate it violently fast until the receiver begins to fecalate and their feces gets spread all over their intestines

(Genghis Khan favorite sexual act (rumored))

Watch this Mongolian blumpkin fister

by Gilf Destroyer 6969 May 20, 2025

Skibidi blumpkin

A blumpkin served by no other than skibidi toilet himself

"I just got a skibidi blumpkin by Ms Anderson"

by Lil_big_fister420_67_R34 June 1, 2025

blueface blumpkin

getting head while inside a skido can. when yku drop one it splashes the blue liquid onto the chicks face

taylor was giving a blueface blumpkin in the skido can at u pull it for five bucks.

by Suka may korncob July 8, 2025

Gummer Blumpkin

Receiving a blow job from someone with no teeth (hence the gummer), while taking a shit on the toilet (hence the blumpkin).

Donald was the most delighted when ol' Betsy from room 309 came down the hall before midnight and surprised him with a Gummer Blumpkin on his birthday; needless to say, that's one way to keep the Doctor away!

by Willywonkered August 9, 2025