Shy Turtle

When you let a little bit of shit come out, and then squat over someone's face, smearing your shit around a bit.

Then withdraw the poop back into your ass, like a shy turtle.

When Matt and Nick were younger, Matt used to shy turtle Nick in his sleep.

by River and Hannah May 4, 2009

turtle head poking out

To have an extreme urge to defecate, so much so that feces may already be spreading the anus and attempting to escape.

Hold up man, I need to visit the crapper, I've got a turtle head poking out.

by Tommy November 19, 2003

turtle-heading

(verb – present participle) The act of experiencing the summit of a crusty turd protruding from your sphincter (a turtle head); to really need a crap

Onlooker: "Why are you walking so strangely?"
Protagonist: "I'm turtle-heading, if I don't find a toilet soon I'm going to purge all over my pants."

by Don de Mookster March 4, 2009

turtle test

A turtle test is when you're not sure if you need to fart or shit, so you relax your butthole and push a little, and if a turtle's head peeks out, you clench your ass so you don't shit yourself. That is a "positive" turtle test. A "negative" is when a fart comes out.

Dude, pull over, I've gotta take a shit.

No way Bro, can't you just fart or something?

I just did a turtle test Dude, and it was positive. Pull over before I shit in your car.

by Otto Parts December 12, 2012

happy turtle

NOUN: a sexually satisfied uncircumsized man.
Turtle references the appearance of an uncut penis.

Girl One: You hooked up with Ricardo?
Girl Two: We had sex all night long.
Girl One: Ah---that was one happy turtle.
Girl Two: Of course.

by rpm+me=ht September 19, 2008

turtle necking

When you are nowhere near a toilet and that turd stuck in your hole is peeking in and out. You gotta have control so it doesn't slip out.

Dude, I have to go so bad I'm turtle necking.

by Mr Poop April 10, 2005

Turtle shell

The really annoying things in mario kart that fuck you up really bad. They come in three different types:green, red(or brown), or blue. The green ones aren't so bad they just fling around stupidly. The brown ones, you should watch out for.
They seek the person in front of you and fuck them up. The blue ones automattically go to the player in 1st place.

"I was in first place, then fuckin yoshi threw a red turtle shell at me and I got fourth."

by thecrazyone1104 June 12, 2008