Granny guff

- The smell old ladies leave behind after having a wee in public conveniences.
Caused due to their inability to urinate without releasing small 'poofs'of fart gas.

Little girl eww, what's that smell mum? Has someone had a poo in there?

mum No sweetie, that's just granny guff.

by kingledreamer345 November 21, 2011

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cum guff

A fart or burp containing a gentleman's semen

Adam had been enjoying an evening of cottaging when he let rip a massive cum guff

by Biggest Boy ever June 20, 2017

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burly guff

A disfiguring skin condition, for example, oozing sores or a horrible rash.

What’s that on your face? Have you got the burly guff?
He came back from his hike in the woods last week with the burly guff.

by speechpath August 18, 2019

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Guff Custard

The substance produced by a shart

The guff custard slowly dribbled down her chin.

by The Gjh,xvkGuff Cusatrrd August 25, 2017

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guff-truck

The vehicle that comes to collect the contents of toilets.

What's that smell?
It's the guff-truck emptying the portaloos. It's OK they'll be gone soon.

by mistafeesh October 25, 2015

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Vaginal flatulence; gentle, bubbly, and hilariously extended sound emanating from a (most probably) posh, set of fanny flaps. She retains eye contact throughout. The glorious noise resembles a trumpet nonchalantly bugling underwater through a dense layer of seaweed.

Dude, I headed down south on this poshy washy, and she gave me a face full of puff guff...

by StripedSocks June 8, 2019

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