stealth masterbating

When one wacks off as quietly as possible so as to not disturb the people in the same room.

Sam: I hope no one notices I am stealth masterbating
Girl friend: Sam ... are you wacking off!!!!
Sam: Oh Shit!

by themanwiththeplan9192 April 4, 2010

masturbating

The act of being busy but still not really having anything to do.

"Hi, you busy?" "Yeah" "What are you doing?" "Masturbating" "Wanna go catch a movie instead?" "Sure"

by TiCyB September 8, 2008

Masterbating Monkey

A primate creature who masterbates.

"Monkey Masterbation Spotting" has become a hobby in the South American State of illinois. A well known competitor in the sport of of Monkey Masterbation Spotting is Fred Phelps, a very vocal and fanatically religeous biggot.

The monkey wrapped his primate hand around his primate pink penis, and masterbated furiously untill he fell out of his tree. Fred Phelps watched in glee as he photographed the event so he could show the pictures to his family.

by Gordon Freeman October 31, 2004

Masturbating

For males it is playing with your wang or joystick on your crotch till you ejaculate white semen. For chicks it's the same except it's their vagina.
Try this: Master of debating(say it quickly and it sounds like masturbating)

Ex: Sarah: Hey what are you doing in the room? Kevin: Well I'm masturbating to porn so don't come in. Sarah: o_O Okay! talk to you later then.

by Mr.Craze February 18, 2009

Masterbation

1. Masturbation after one attains a new rank or does an important feat, or anything that would make one feel important.

2. Masturbation while in a rank of power or authority.

"Today was a great day, I won the spelling bee then i Masterbated."

"Dude you're 9... masterbation?"

"Feels Good man."

by KooKid October 23, 2009

unchristian masturbating

1. masturbating to thoughts ov sex with women and not jesus/god; masturbating to porn or the excorsist.

"Father, forgive me for i have sinned, the other day i was jacking off to tera patrick getting rammed by a huge weiner"

"that is unchristian masturbating my son"

by incipitsathanas October 29, 2009

Mastercation

Due to intense lack of funds, a mastercation is a "staycation" wherein the only planned activity for amusement is masturbation. Should only be attempted by the truly pathetic.

I signed up for Naughty America for three days for $1.95, so I think I'm going to take Monday off and have myself a little mastercation.

by RoboNasty July 21, 2009