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Joy Reid defense

A quasi legal but technologically illiterate attempt to blame embarrassing or incriminating social media or blogging activity on 'hacking' by a sophisticated, imaginary third party. E.g:
“I learned that an unknown, external party accessed and manipulated material from my now-defunct blog, The Reid Report, to include offensive and hateful references that are fabricated and run counter to my personal beliefs and ideology,”
A: hey so as you know I'm totally stoked about running for office this fall but it turns out some random guy 'hacked' my Facebook and posted a bunch of racist shit like 5 years ago but I only just noticed now.
B: ok but that seems kind of implausible so did that actually happen or are you just Joy Reid defense'ing me right now?
A: ...
by McFly. Brundle McFly September 4, 2018
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Bill O'Reily Defense

When faced with an irrefutable point, start talking out of your ass and when your opponent attempts to call you out on it say "let me finish" and then when it's their turn to talk yell over them until the show goes to commercial.
Some Guy: Bill, last week on your show you said that Britney Spears was a ruthless whore, and yet you defend Sarah Palin's daughter
*Bill employs the Bill O'Reily Defense*
Bill: Well that is absolutely taking things out of context and these two things are in no way related to each other at all and I for one am appalled that you'd resort to such trivial things like taking what I said last week and relating it to what I am saying this week
Some Guy: well actually that's-
Bill O'Reily: let me finish. so you need to take a look in the mirror and stop making such wild claims like what you've just said.
Some Guy: What you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
Bill O'Reily during the above statement: HAOIUSDFHOIASHFOIJWAEPOIFHASOIDFHAOISDHFOPIASJHDFPOIJABOIJFDOIAHBJFDPVOIAJDFIOJ
cut to commercial
by falcon176 January 16, 2009
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Sex Defender

Someone who practices consensual sex (opposite of sex offender)
"Are you a sex defender?"
"Yea, consent is poggers!"
by GiornoGiovanna January 4, 2021
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defenestrate

Larry pissed me off, so I defenestrated him off the thirty-first floor. What a mess.
by Daniel December 8, 2002
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self defeces

Is a tactical countermeasure that involves defending oneself by shitting your self. it is a legal justification for the use of feces in times of danger.
Kid 1 : "Hey, how did you stop that bully from beating you up"
kid 2: "I stopped him by using self defeces"

Kid 1 : "Oh nice you shit yourself to as a method of self defense, GENIUS! "
by 12many1s November 6, 2014
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The Lotion Defense

A term used to defend the presence of light white stains on a womens black yoga pants. Much like the Toothpaste Defense.
Hey Babe is that Jizz on the back of your yoga pants? No its body lotion! The Lotion Defense.
by Chuck Clark September 16, 2012
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US Secretary of Defense Parnas

The newest appointee in the administration of the 45th POTUS.
The newest US Secretary of Defense Parnas was tapped by Putin’s Bitch this morning when he told his good buddy Lev that he was sorry he acted like he didn’t know him and that Parnas was “up next” for this plum job where he can work directly with Vlady and all the other good buddies in Moscow and Ukraine.
by Dr Bunnygirl November 5, 2019
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